I am convinced that you many times in your life tried your level best to be the best you can be and possibly failed miserably. The reason why it is so difficult to modify defective behaviour can be traced to defective belief systems you hold about yourself. You can only modify your behaviour when you replace the defective perception with an updated and more accurate version. You can read as much as you like and listen to lectures until you are blue in the face and achieve little on no success. A new replacement file is only uploaded in your archives when you believe that the improved version is superior. New information goes directly into the garbage bin in your head without the important “belief” element. The key that provide new and fresh perspectives access to the archives in your head is the element of “belief”. You have a reticular activating system in your head that prevent you to see, feel and experience anything that fail to match your current belief system. Guess who is in control of this system? Your ego is the controller of this system. Your ego will not switch off this system until you convince him that you believe that the replacement data is now more appropriate.
Do you know why your ego is in control of your life? It is in control because you handed this silly software compiler in your head the power. You need to take your power back and pull the plug on your ego. How do you do this? You stop believing all the lies that they ego and the ego of other tell you. You start living your life one moment at a time and treat each and every moment on merit. You become objective and realistic. It is impossible for the ego to survive when you operate from the current moment. The ego can only operate when it process historical data or project perceived outcomes. I can guarantee you that you life will improve overnight when you start living your life in the “now”.
There is no need to defend or debate the truth. Lies in turn need constant defensive actions and activities. Lies only survive because we believe them. The truth will always remain the truth whether you believe it or not. You give yourself the best opportunity to disconnect from the lies stored in your archives if you take control back from the ego. This can be done if you as indicated above live your life one moment at a time. Learn to ignore the voice in your head and remain focused on the absolute reality that you have in front of you. This is easier said that done, but you can do it. The rewards that you receive when you start living without the constant ramblings of the voice in your head are unbelievable. Your life and relationships will take on a brand new meaning. Life becomes less complicated and much more productive and pleasant. You will in a relative short period of time discover that all the lies and half-truths that you used historically made no constructive contribution to any aspect of your life. Do not allow your fear to let go of the defective historical lies rob you of the brand new life that is awaiting you.
There is no doubt in my mind that what you feel is real and a projection of your authentic self. Every emotion that you experience has its source in your soul and spirit. You might attempt to hide and repress what you experience or fake that you are not feeling a thing, but the fact of the matter is that it is real and authentic.
The voice in your head often succeeds in making you feel miserable, guilty, ashamed or angry. There is absolutely nothing wrong when you experience feelings that bubble to the surface. There are no acceptable or unacceptable or good or bad feelings. All feelings and emotions bubble up from your authentic self. You may experience feelings of rage, hate, anger or jealousy, but need to understand that there is a good reason why these feelings are showing up in your space.
Absolutely everything you perceive or think activates an emotional reaction in you. Your own thoughts, perceptions, judgements and beliefs trigger a reaction in your heart and mind. Every time you judge yourself you experience an unpleasant range of feelings that rush through your system. Your task is to clean up these unpleasant feelings until they loose their grip on you. Repressing what you feel will not benefit you. You are in actual fact busy lying to yourself when you play-act that you are made of stone and that nothing can penetrate your shield. The lies programmed into you is the cause and your emotions is the feedback system (effect) that warn you that you are using defective data stored in your mental filing system that must still be checked. I want to repeat that your emotions and feelings are real, but the triggers are not real and rooted in your data bank.
When we suffer and experience pain, discomfort and distress it is always an honest reaction. Nobody ever took the time to explain to you that the reason for your suffering is always based in your defective perceptions. Where did all the perceptions that you currently hold come from? All your perceptions became real the moment you believed the defective information downloaded into your head by those that were responsible for your preparation for life. Emotions are just a symptom of how you have been abused by others with their defective input. You sustained this abuse on yourself because you perceived that you are just not good enough. Your emotions and feelings play a vital role as a “feed back” system. Your emotions tell you how what progress you are making in your “de-bugging” attempt to rid your sub-conscious mind of the lies and half-truths downloaded into your head when you were still a child. You can thus use your emotional reactions as a guide. When you experience anger it indicates to you that there are still warped perceptions that need purification. The same goes for all your other negative and destructive emotions. The key to the successful de-bugging of your defective perceptions are to become aware that your reactions when painful or unpleasant are always rooted in fear and lies.