So many things we would rather not focus on!


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Posted by on June 22, 2017 in WISDOM








STAY OPEN ALL HOURS FOR MIRACLES: If you are like everyone else on this planet, you have been tempted a thousand times to give up on life, love, happiness and yourself. You have experienced failure, heartbreak, pain and personal hell. It is one of the world’s worst kept secrets that everyone – yes – everyone – has had a dark night of the soul. We have all wanted to give up and die. 

When life is not working for you, I want to ask you to give up. Yes! I want you to give up your thoughts, beliefs, perceptions, habits and fears that are holding you back. There can be no new miracles whilst you are holding on to old stuff. Pain is a signal to let go, give something up, open up and try something new. When life is not working for you, you might think that you are just not trying hard enough.

Whenever you feel stuck or that you are not making satisfactory progress it can always be linked to something or someone that are keeping you locked in. We are often our own worse enemies and allow our thoughts to lock us into the past or the future. We can only be at one place at any given moment in time. If you mind is locked into yesterday’s mistakes, guilt and failures, how can you operate successfully in the now? If your mind is paralysed with fear because of something that might happen at some future date, how can you operate successfully in the now?

If you are not satisfied with any situation or person then it might be a clear indication that you urgently need to let go of something or even someone. We often feel that we need to learn more or do more if we want success, but success is usually a ridding process. You usually do not need more weight, rules, laws and principle to complicate your life even more. What you need is a simple method of taking stock of what is outdated, overrated, and wrong or over its shelf life. Once you have identified what must go and you got rid of it you will be ready to start a new day and possibly a new life. Let us take a look at some of the weights that you may want to throw overboard.






























GIVE UP AND LIVE AGAIN: Why is it so difficult to give things up? I found that people hate giving things up even if they serve no real further purpose in their lives. Just look around you and see if you can spot anything that is outdated, broken and dysfunctional. It can be an old broken chair or an old bicycle in your garage. You might never use it again, but for sentimental reasons hold on to it as if it is made of gold. Take stock today and you will see that there are possibly hundreds of things that you have not used, touched or looked at in the last twelve months that are just sitting there and cluttering your space.

Possibly and old computer, books, magazines or exercise equipment just lying there cluttering the room or your garage. Most of this stuff served their purpose, but you hang on to them as if your life depends on them.

We do the same with thousands of old and outdated thoughts and feelings as well. We tend to hang on to old fears, failures, mistakes and guilt feelings as if our lives depend on them. What we fail to understand is that we need to cast out old and outdated perceptions from yesterday to make room for new ideas and opportunities that may come our way today.

While we drag these old thoughts and fears with us no real change will come into our lives. Only when we understand that only the now is alive and our window of opportunity will wisdom come into our lives. Yesterday with all its mistakes, sins, wounds and failures is dead and gone forever. The only place where these failures and guilt is still alive is in your imaginations. It is like old dusty videotapes that you take out now and then and play on the screens of your mind.

All the old “pain” tapes that you regularly haul out of the filing system in your mind and play serves no other purpose than that of self-punishment. You have been conditioned since early childhood to feel guilty when you failed or did something wrong. The only way that you were taught that you could repair or repay for your wrongdoings was that of punishment.

You were taught that all sins carry the same weight and as such soon found that the punishment metered out was not enough for your ever growing mountain of failures and sins. Your ego loved this and used this false sense of guilt to punish you and kept you locked into the past.


WHEN IT IS OVER IT IS OVER: The day that you realise that you have only the moment that you are living in right now to live in and to love in your will life changes dramatically. When you finally LET GO of the past unconditionally you enter a wonderful new period in your life. You need to learn to let go of things once its life moment is over.

You can file the information in your mind and learn from your mistakes, but when that moment is over then it is over forever. You may decide to take a few selected thoughts with you, but they should never include pain and guilt. You can recall wonderful moments in your life that will built you and motivate you, but should not spoil your perfect new moment by blending in old garbage moments. Let go and live a life of pleasure and joy. Cling to past failures and create your own personal hell on earth. You are the creator of your own future and the victim of your past. Disconnect today and give yourself a break.


LEAD THE WAY: If you can teach the people that play in your game of life this golden rule you will refresh and renew the world that you live in. If everybody stops living in the past and begin to focus on the now you are going to enjoy many moments of success and fun together. No more time will be wasted on what could or should have been or done. They will make the most of any given moment and begin to love each other unconditionally.

When everyone stops reminding each other of yesterday’s broken promises, failures, conflicts and petty arguments they learn to accept each other unconditionally. Yes my friend lead by example and explain to all players in your game of life that you will not entertain any garbage reshuffling from now on. 

People treat you the way you teach them to treat you. Teach the other players in your life that you will from now on just accept “now” talk in your life. If anything from yesterday needs to be re-viewed it will be done in an objective manner and then shredded. The next time you get stuck go through the list in the document in see what things need urgent dumping. Let go of the past (even ten seconds ago) and start living every fresh new moment to the full.




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Posted by on June 22, 2017 in WISDOM


Knowledge shines a light into the dark places in our minds.





How many of us fail to read the connection between the horrific negative impact that NON-ACTION and RESISTANCE play in our lives. Look around you and you will find that we abuse drugs; we daily eat the abuse and intimidation from lovers, family, so-called friends and the government. We allow the banks to use and abuse us. We end up in hospital with stress related illnesses. We pay gurus and religious leaders a fortune to say things that we hope will dull our pain and give us hope. Many of us are drinking as if they are going to take alcohol from the market. We today live in a society that is under financial pressure all the time. We work like crazy and even neglect our children in an attempt to survive one more month. Some of us are well qualified and experienced in our selected professions, but fail to get a job because of our skin colour and the toxic state of the economy world-wide. Everyone have a powerful voice inside them that can direct their lives on a moment to moment basis. This guide and wisdom source has been carefully polluted with many layers of conditioning and habits since early childhood. We are so busy running away mentally and physically that we fail to notice the little voice inside us that is well cocooned by an endless range of perceptions. We can explode this wall of RESISTANCE today if we are brave enough to admit that we have become slaves to the system. The little voice and brilliant genius in our hearts and minds tell us to go for gold and do what needs to be done, but we ignore these messages because we are shit scared to go up against the endless perceptions, rules and regulations that enclosed us in our cold little igloo. We more often than not know exactly what we need to do or what we should avoid, but do little or nothing while we helplessly hammer against the wall of RESISTANCE built with bricks of fear. A large percentage stopped attacking the wall of RESISTANCE and fall apart when confronted by challenges. These individuals either live in denial or justify their NON-ACTION with stupid excuses.


Spend some time today gathering information about the stuff that you know need to be completed that you have been postponing for far too long now. The wall of RESISTANCE consists out of thousands of bricks manufactured by ignorant individuals with no vision. Ignorance is the biggest killer of dreams. Knowledge shines a light into the dark places in our minds that we run away from. Information is your key to success and freedom. I will continue this series tomorrow.




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Posted by on June 22, 2017 in WISDOM


Why You have a Fear of Pleasure.


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Posted by on June 21, 2017 in WISDOM


What’s left to do but to plunge right in and enjoy the show?


Everyday life, the time between sitting calmly on your cushion, is an important time for a meditator, in Tibetan Buddhism it is called the post meditation period and is seen as just as important as formal meditation, if not more important. After all the time spent on your cushion is only a fraction of the time you spend in every day life.

A powerful method for keeping an enlightened meditative composure throughout the day is to be mindful that everything experienced is dreamlike and illusory. Masters of illusions are people who can move through the world while staying detached and still keeping their compassion for all the dream-like characters that they meet. Or as Meditation Master Milarepa says:

“Know that the world of appearances are illusory, and have compassion for those who don’t understand.”

To remain in the ‘Unborn’ was Zen Master Bankei’s advice for avoiding straying into the illusory nature of the world – dwelling in that which does not arise and does not die as a personal experience of enlightened naturalness. Nothing else needs to be practiced, he would say. No need to follow the dream-like appearances, simply remain in unborn awareness which was his way of pointing to that permanent presence at the heart of all experience. Another great meditation master Arjahn Chah hints at the same thing when he said:

“Just this is the aim of all this difficult practice we put ourselves through; is to discover the natural purity of our mind and not get lost in sense impressions.”

Getting caught up in our sense impression is getting caught up in judgement about them, getting caught in the never ending matrix of comparisons and desire and looking for completion in the ever unfolding relative world. That is the very cause of suffering, trying to be complete in what by nature is incomplete and constantly changing. How can we find satisfaction in things that never stay still?

A master of illusions is a meditator who can remain in awareness and ‘dream’ lucidly during waking hours; continuing through normal everyday life but with a distinct impression of events being ephemeral and dream-like. This enables practitioners to navigate the world while keeping connection with the natural presence of awareness and simultaneously experiencing the ebb and flow of constantly changing events.

This is closer to the actual reality of things than our normal impression of things being fixed and objective. Buddha himself described the reality of things with several metaphors and warned that things do not exist the way they appear and therefore he said reality is like:

“A mirage, a cloud castle, a dream, an apparition, without essence, but with qualities that can be seen.”

So who is the deceiver that tricks us, is it the Buddhist demon Mara, is it the temptations of the Christian Devil or is it the Hindu idea of the great trickster ‘Maya‘ ? Well they could all be symbols of what seems to be just the limited apparatus of the human mechanism.

We are not designed to witness the totality of reality, it’s just too enormous, our brains are designed to filter out most of reality so what is left is the bare essentials to survive in our limited dimension. It’s ourselves that conjure up illusory appearances with our own minds and then believe them. Or put more crudely people tend to make shit up and then believe it to be true.

When a person gets drawn into the seemingly real dramas of life, the sense of a dream-like existence fades into the background and the predominant experience becomes one of being contracted, serious and confused. We get drawn into an illusory dream to find love and security and forgetting it is not substantial we pursue unattainable goals and therefore get frustrated time and time again.

Like the Christian analogy of being lost is the shadows of the valley of death; or like Plato’s allegory of the cave where prisoners in a cave mistake shadows on the wall for people and start to name them until one brave person stands up to go outside for the first time and discover the truth of the illusion, ironical he has a tough time convincing the people still in the cave that the shadows are not the whole picture.

Within Buddhist ways of thinking our nature is already pure and complete but there are six dimensions people get drawn into by forgetting appearances are illusory. Briefly, the six realms of distraction that move people off the indestructible throne of Being and into suffering and frustration are 1) hedonism 2) egoic pride 3) anger 4) jealousy 5) confusion and 6) addiction. All of these realms have a slightly different feel and type of suffering but they all arise from the primary mistake of grasping at things to be real and substantial and therefore can all be avoided by remembering ‘this is just a dream’ appearances are not substantially real and not taking things too seriously.

To be committed to seeing life as a dream is to see all things equally. Everything that happens is equally a dream event, nothing is more or less important than anything else, and this allows a sense of equanimity to be present and makes it easier to relax into a natural state of being. Or like a popular psychotherapist Richard Carlson says “don’t sweat the small stuff, and it’s all small stuff” I would like to tweak this slightly and remind people:

“Don’t sweat the dream stuff, and it’s all dream stuff.”

The practice of viewing life in a dream-like way also undermines our usual selfishness and egoic pursuits that usually lead to harming ourselves and others. By viewing life in a dream-like way it illuminates the moment with a light-hearted presence which helps to be easy-going, relaxed and not take things so seriously. This is more than just relaxation though; if letting go is complete, the enlightened ground of our being is touched and activated.

Letting go from controlling the dream and surrendering to just being brings with it an immense freedom and a flood of good qualities. There is no where else to get to, the infinite is not an experience neither is enlightenment, all experiences are conditioned and come and go in the flux of the dream. You can only ever realise the truth of being human and no longer be distracted by fear or desire for a dream like world; the natural awakened qualities of love, wisdom and joy can shine through unhindered. Being a master of illusion is detaching from believing in the dream and connecting with the pure energy of an eternal wakefulness. What’s left to do but to plunge right in and enjoy the show?


By Chad Foreman / The Way of Meditation


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Posted by on June 21, 2017 in WISDOM


Is it easy for people to be with you?



Display true compassion, warmth and understanding if you want to penetrate the defenses of someone. You might be pushing people away with your cold and calculating style. Compassion draw people to you while a lack of compassion sends them into hiding. Is it easy for people to be with you?


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Posted by on June 21, 2017 in WISDOM


The biggest factor holding us back – Simply and sadly, our own selves.




Everyone has one common goal in life: to achieve true happiness. The biggest factor holding us back from achieving our dreams is, simply and sadly, our own selves. We put limitations on ourselves everyday, whether intentionally or unintentionally. There are so many ways we can alleviate these restraints.

Remember, life can either be something you embrace or something you hide from. Stop making things complicated and just live your life. It would be so much simpler and more enjoyable if we learned to just release certain limitations.

Let’s take a look at the things you need to let go of in order to become a happier person.

Let Go Let God1. The Approval Of Others

Who gives a sh*t what other people think? If you are happy with the decisions you have made, then whose business is that but your own? Think of how much you could achieve if you stopped letting other people’s opinions dictate the way you live your life. Do you, and engage in whatever actions you think might better your life.

2. Anger/Resentment

Anger will eat at you from the inside. Learn how to make peace with those who have wronged you. This isn’t about letting the other person off the hook; it’s about alleviating the pain that resonates within you. Keep in mind that he who angers you, controls you.

3. Negative Body Image

There is only one person’s opinion you should be concerned with when it comes to your body and that is you. No one person determines what the “correct” body type is. If you are comfortable in your own skin, and you are healthy, then that should be the only thing that matters. Do not let others tell you that you’re not beautiful because if you believe you are, then you are.

4. Idea Of A Perfect Partner

There is no such thing as a perfect partner, so throw your checklist out the window. In life, what prevents us from moving forward is looking at the perfect image of a partner we concoct in our minds. Find the right person for you: one that you can love with all your heart, one you feel comfortable with and one that accepts you for the person you are. The sooner you realize there isn’t one perfect person out there for you, the better off you will be.


“He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect for more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.” – Bob Marley

5. Perfect Life

Just like there is no perfect partner, there is also not a perfect life. Life is what you put into it, so if you are not willing to work hard and put forth effort, you will most likely end up miserable. The choices you make will directly reflect the life you lead. It is up to you to create the best possible world for yourself.

6. You’re Going To Be Rich

Too many people live their lives with the thought that they will be millionaires. While this can be a realistic goal for some, it is not something that can be achieved without hard work and dedication. Stop letting money be your sole motivator; find a career you are passionate about and immerse yourself in it completely.

7. The Idea That Good Fortune Will Arrive At Your Doorstep

You need to go out into the world and actively look for fulfillment. You cannot take a backseat in life and expect things to happen for you. Appreciate the life you live, and be grateful for what you have. Value each minute of every day. Live like there’s no tomorrow, and make the most out of any situation.

8. Excuses

Make no time for excuses. You want to work out, but you don’t have the time? Wake up early and get your gym on. Excuses are only rationalizations that make you feel better about yourself for not doing something you want/need to be doing. You desire results? Stop bitching, and start doing.

9. Thoughts Of Your Ex

This person is your ex for a reason. If you are going to think of him or her at all, try and think only about the lessons the experience taught you. Do not linger on any old feelings, as this will only prevent you from being happy with someone else in the future.

10. Stubbornness

I know it’s hard to admit, but sometimes you are just wrong. Other people have just as much capability as you do in providing the correct answer, so stop being stubborn and just embrace it. The less stubborn you act, the more open you are to learning new things. Think of all you could be exposed to if you stopped believing in opinions other than your own.

11. Procrastination

Stop thinking you will finally get to whatever task is at hand tomorrow. Live in the present, and get your sh*t done when it needs to be done. Maximize your time to the best of your ability. Complete each task you need to as soon as you can. This allows you to feel free from worry and stress by getting things out of the way as soon as possible. You also allow yourself more free time to enjoy the things you love.

12. Your Baggage

We have all been hurt one time or another by someone we loved, or we thought we loved. Carrying negative feelings into future relationships will only prove to be disastrous. No two people are the same, so it’s unfair to hold a future partner to a standard set by an ex. Try to begin each new relationship with a clean slate.

13. Negativity

What you put out into the universe will come back to you, so change the way you think, immediately. Stop thinking of life as a glass half empty, but rather, half full. You have so much to be grateful for, if only you took a moment to appreciate it. Anything is possible in the mind of a positive thinker.

14. Judgmental Thoughts

Why do people feel the need to constantly worry about what is going on in other people’s lives? If we spent as much time worrying about our own behaviors as we do worrying about those of others, our lives would be a whole lot more meaningful. You have no idea what is going on in another person’s life, so who are you to pass judgment on the way they act?

15. Jealousy

Happiness is not having what you want; it’s wanting what you have. Stop envying others and learn to appreciate what you have. Everyone’s life is unique; you have certain things to offer that others cannot. When we act in a jealous manner, all we do is bring negative feelings into our lives. There is absolutely nothing to gain from behaving this way.

16. Insecurity

Happy people tend to have extremely high levels of self-esteem. They accept who they are and work it everyday of their lives. They radiate confidence, flaunt their pride and give off positive vibes. There is no reason to be insecure in life. If there are things you are self-conscious about, go out into the world and seek to change them. Only you have the ability to create the best version of yourself.

17. Depending On Others For Happiness

At the end of the day, the only person you can count on 100 percent of the time is yourself. Do not make the unfortunate mistake many people do and put your happiness in the hands of others. A relationship is not going to fulfill the void if you can’t even make yourself happy. You need to achieve happiness on your own before you can find someone else to share it with. This creates a detrimental dependency that will prevent you from becoming self-sufficient.

18. The Past

Stop living in the past! There is virtually nothing you can gain if you wallow in mistakes you have previously made. Take past mistakes as lessons learned, and move forward. You cannot wholeheartedly move on to a better future if you are constantly looking behind you. Things happened, and that’s that. Take them with a grain of salt and move on.

19. The Need For Control

Sometimes you just need to let life happen the way it is meant to. You cannot spend your life stressing about things that are outside of your control. Try to relax, and let things play out naturally. Embrace the unknown, as this is where you will be surprised the most. Let yourself be whisked into unforeseen endeavors, and relish in the excitement they bring.

20. Expectations

Managing your expectations is the key to happiness. If you let go of expectations, you will never be disappointed. Often, we tend to believe that the way we treat others will be the way we are treated in return. Unfortunately, this does not always happen. Do not expect a certain result from any given situations. Go into an experience with an open mind. This will allow you to fully immerse yourself, without the pressure of living up to preconceived notions.


By Ashley Fern / Elite Daily

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Posted by on June 20, 2017 in WISDOM

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