The 10 Guidelines of Tweeting Drunk!

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You had to do it, didn’t you? You were drunk and couldn’t wait for the morning, fearing the thought and the nerve would escape you by then. You opened up your Twitter client on your iPhone after one too many or you popped open your laptop after stumbling home and spilled out what felt like pure genius―misspellings and all―sharing your life-changing proclamations with the world. Then, of course, the next day you realized how stupid you actually were to divulge so much to your precious list of followers.

See, this Twitter thing is great; it’s a cultural game-changer, one of the fastest growing networks of the history of our race. But this stuff ain’t no MSN to your BFF or Yahoo! Chat to your ex. We’re not talking BB Messenging your boss or a simple cellphone text to your mom. These can all put you in a bad position if done while intoxicated, but to tweet under the influence can end up like a straight-up middle finger to basically everyone. You’re posting your Hello World to the universe, and very likely it will come out as “Wello Horld”.

To help prevent you from making a big social networking boo-boo, I’ve put together the definite guideline for drunk tweeting. (Okay, it’s more like a top ten list). Some might say you shouldn’t tweet while drunk at all; I say go right ahead. Just play by these rules.

1. No emotionally-charged tweets while drunk. It’s bad enough hearing about your broken heart or your lust for the President during working hours. Don’t pollute my Twitter feed with sappy sentiments while drooling on your Stoli-O cosmo.

2. Yes, please tell us where you’re partying, who you’re with, and which celebrities you think you’ve seen. But make sure you ration it out. We don’t need to know every 5 minutes. Sure, maybe your nightlife is way cooler than mine, but there’s a fine line between sharing it with the world and blatantly rubbing it in (or just being a big-headed ass).

3. Some of my friends tend to forget what they’ve just said when they’re drinking. So they end up telling me the same sentence 3 or 4 times. I’ve seen this happen with tweets. Before sending out that mind-blowing Twitter comment, be sure it’s the first time you’ll be doing so. Sometimes just once is too many; twice is certainly way overdoing it.

4. Watch your mouth, man! If you normally don’t put nasty words in your tweets, don’t use drunkenness as an excuse. You should use your same voice as always. Your followers don’t want you to be one person in the day and another at night (unless that’s your schtick, but I highly doubt it).

5. Tattle-tailing is for kindergarten. If you’re old enough to be on Twitter and certainly if you’ve got a few drink in you, hopefully you’ve moved on from that. Don’t throw your buddy under the bus by tweeting that he just bought a drink for some chick at the bar, when his fiancé’s best friend is your follower. Keep your Twitter thoughts simple and clearly inoffensive, or the next time you’ll be drunk-tweeting about why you think none of your friends will hang out with you.

6. Tell us funny, happy, and exciting things. Keep a positive attitude while tweeting and your comments might actually be worth reading. But if your mood is down, stay away from your Twitter client. Drunk-tweets can sometimes be hilarious, clever, or interestingly weird, but if you’re a depressed drunk they’ll likely be none of that and can be the direct cause of dropped followers.

7. Okay, what the hell am I supposed to be seeing here? Make sure if you’re uploading party pics to Twitpic or some other Twitter photo site that they’re worth looking at. And also that they’re not too worth looking at. Or maybe having a picture of you dancing on the bar with your pants down posted all over the Internet is a major goal of yours.

8. Hey, save it. If what you need to say is not time dependent, take a note of it and tweet it later if it proves itself worthy. Go ahead and tell us what you’re up to, whose name to use at the door, and all the other right-now need-to-knows, but when it comes to your thoughts about what happened last week or your screenplay idea, jot it down. Twitter is a mass messaging tool, not a notebook.

9. Put the damn phone in your pocket and hang out with your friends already! I know you need to be constantly connected, but don’t forget there’s a real world outside social networking that is actually a hell of a lot more fun. Spend some time with some living, breathing humans in the flesh for once. And if you’re sending out a tweet from your laptop at home with a nearly empty bottle of Jack in your hand, well for-crying-out-loud get out once in a while, will you? (Just wait until you’ve slept it off this one time.)

10. And for-god’s-sake, tell us what you’re drinking. If you’re going to put us through your drunk ramblings via Tweetie, you might as well let us know how you got in such a sorry place to begin with. Hopefully it’s something half-way decent.

Yeah, I know. Some of these are common sense and basically go without saying. But you’re drunk, aren’t you? Common sense has gone out the window a few hours ago. Look, drunk-tweeting can be a mess. But hopefully now you can limit your clean-up. I can’t guarantee your safety when tweeting during a late-night out, but follow these guidelines and you should be in better shape than if you didn’t. Now get out there and enjoy a good cocktail.

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By Joseph Boroski

Originally Published at SipSlowly: Drunk Tweeting

Visit for more stunning articles

http://www.sexcigarsbooze.com/

 

We develop and build up our “I” through a mirroring process of what others tell us about us.

How Core Beliefs are Built in Childhood

What are core beliefs? How do they end up playing such an important role in who we are and in our lives? How do we get them? Do we have access to them? Are we aware of them? Is it within our power to discard the ones that do not serve us?

This topic is really inexhaustible, but, in this article, I will touch upon some basic processes. Beginning in infancy, and early childhood two main processes are responsible for the way we view ourselves, our world, our place in it and our relationship to it: our personal observations, through our senses and autonomous thinking processes, and the influence of others.

As far as our sense of self is concerned, initially, we develop and build up our “I” through a mirroring process of what others tell us about us. “You are so pretty!” “You are a bad boy.” “You are stupid.” “You are lazy”. “You are just like your father”. “You’re like me, hopeless in mats”. In conversations among grownups which we happen to eavesdrop on we hear: “Oh I don’t know what to do with her she is such a jealous child”. “He is my nightmare, I can’t wait for his bedtime so I can rest a bit”. “She’s chubby, but it runs in the family”. The “you are’s” and “he/she is’s” that we have heard in our childhood alone are countless. Some, to be sure, were circumstantial, although that says nothing about how one comment, one word spoken only once, one glance may have branded us for life. Others were repeatedly hurled at us. Some were not even necessarily “bad”, for instance: “she is so sweet and well-mannered”. “He always does what I tell him to do, he is so obedient.” These are “good” things, from a grownup’s point of view, right?

So, you may ask, does what we are told really determine who we are? The answer is no. It does not determine who we are, but it determines who we think we are. If the influences are strong, persistent, repetitive, we may grow without having even an inkling of who we really are. We have become a conglomerate of our parents’ most exacting expectations and worst fears. What’s worse is that we believe in this conglomerate as being our own true self.

You become hopeless in math. You become an overweight person. You become lazy. You become too obedient and compliant for your own good. You become so sweet and well-mannered that you do not react when people step all over you. You become what you repeatedly heard others say about you. All the countless “you are’s” and “he/she is’s” comprise what you call your Self. Isn’t there just a tiny bit of some authentic stuff in me, you may ask, is all of it conditioned in, drilled in, has not something of the realer me been retained? And you are right, there is, and bits and parts of you have indeed been retained. Those are the parts that eventually may urge you to seek some form of therapy, those are the parts that may erupt in unruly behavior, those are the parts that are extremely sensitive to criticism, to labeling, even to praise, because “praise” can be another victimizing behavior by shrewd adults and it is very widely used: “oh, I count on you to be mature and not hit your little sister when she ruins your school project you have been working on all week”.

Later on, more autonomous processes are at play, to be sure. Our own personal observations, our own identifications, choices and modeling of others, and various events that may leave a positive or negative mark – these are all ways of how the “I am” of each one of us is formed, influenced, empowered or disempowered. As we grow up, go to school, we develop our own “I am’s and am nots”. But by the time we are able to form our own opinions about our self and others, not only do we already carry some “baggage” of other’s people’s opinions of us, but we have also “inherited” a way of formulating, assessing and storing these personal opinions.

What I am trying to point out in this article is a subtle yet very powerful factor that is really responsible for a lot of damage, particularly if the outside influences or our own conclusions about ourselves are negative and self-sabotaging. Language is very important as a thinking tool, in fact there can be no thinking without language, except in very rudimentary forms. And we all make a small linguistic mistake which may have tremendous cognitive and emotional consequences: the erroneous use of the verb to be.

To make this point clear, compare these two sentences: What you did was (bad, rude, inconsiderate, wonderful, clever, stupid, etc.) You are (bad, rude, inconsiderate, wonderful, clever, stupid, etc.)

Unfortunately, this fatal linguistic mistake is very commonly made in our culture, and it affects very powerfully our cognitive processes, by leading us to conclusions that are over-generalized, absolutist, rigid, all-inclusive and permanent. Once all these various “you are’s” and “I am’s” are programmed into your basic programming, your self structure, you function automatically because your subconscious has accepted these conclusions as truths and as instructions that will automatically guide your action, your sense of self, and your presence in and interaction with the world.

This same process and the same linguistic and cognitive mistake is repeated also at a wider scale. Consider:

They (as a social class, a religious group, a racial group, an ethnic group) are…

We, in our family are….

Women are…

Men are…

The world is ….

Life is ….

So, you can see how powerful this little verb can be…Perhaps, while reading this article you remembered the “you are” gifts you received in your childhood, the “I am” gifts you have given yourself since.

Take a few moments to reflect on the following questions:

 

• Which “you are’s” and “I am’s” in your experience do you find dysfunctional for you and would like to eliminate from your self-concept?

 

• What core beliefs about you and the world do you believe are hindering instead of encouraging your development and prevent you from realizing your highest potential?

 

• Which of your core beliefs are constructive and conducive to a healthy and happy life?

by Ismini Apostoli

 

The “You are so pretty!” “a bad boy.” “stupid.” “lazy”. “like your father/mother” messages that still control your life today.

 

 

My friend Ismini suddenly passed on, on the 11^th January 2010. It was this article that resulted in a wonderful relationship that developed between us. I wrote to Ismini to ask permission to use this article on my blog. She immediately without hesitation provided me with not only permission to use this article, but any of her other works that I deem acceptable. I soon discovered that she is not just a person that is an outstanding author, but someone that is authentic and that actually live her messages. Ismini your pen stopped documenting your wisdom, your voice is quiet now, but you will live on forever in all your patients and my heart and mind.  

 

Rene

 

What are core beliefs? How do they end up playing such an important role in who we are and in our lives? How do we get them? Do we have access to them? Are we aware of them? Is it within our power to discard the ones that do not serve us?

This topic is really inexhaustible, but, in this article, I will touch upon some basic processes. Beginning in infancy, and early childhood two main processes are responsible for the way we view ourselves, our world, our place in it and our relationship to it: our personal observations, through our senses and autonomous thinking processes, and the influence of others.

As far as our sense of self is concerned, initially, we develop and build up our “I” through a mirroring process of what others tell us about us. “You are so pretty!” “You are a bad boy.” “You are stupid.” “You are lazy”. “You are just like your father”. “You’re like me, hopeless in maths . In conversations among grown-ups which we happen to eavesdrop on we hear: “Oh I don’t know what to do with her she is such a jealous child”. “He is my nightmare, I can’t wait for his bedtime so I can rest a bit”. “She’s chubby, but it runs in the family”. The “you are’s” and “he/she is’s” that we have heard in our childhood alone are countless. Some, to be sure, were circumstantial, although that says nothing about how one comment, one word spoken only once, one glance may have branded us for life. Others were repeatedly hurled at us. Some were not even necessarily “bad”, for instance: “she is so sweet and well-mannered”. “He always does what I tell him to do, he is so obedient.” These are “good” things, from a grownup’s point of view, right?

So, you may ask, does what we are told really determine who we are? The answer is no. It does not determine who we are, but it determines who we think we are. If the influences are strong, persistent, repetitive, we may grow without having even an inkling of who we really are. We have become a conglomerate of our parents’ most exacting expectations and worst fears. What’s worse is that we believe in this conglomerate as being our own true self.

You become hopeless in math. You become an overweight person. You become lazy. You become too obedient and compliant for your own good. You become so sweet and well-mannered that you do not react when people step all over you. You become what you repeatedly heard others say about you. All the countless “you are’s” and “he/she is’s” comprise what you call your Self. Isn’t there just a tiny bit of some authentic stuff in me, you may ask, is all of it conditioned in, drilled in, has not something of the realer me been retained? And you are right, there is, and bits and parts of you have indeed been retained. Those are the parts that eventually may urge you to seek some form of therapy, those are the parts that may erupt in unruly behavior, those are the parts that are extremely sensitive to criticism, to labeling, even to praise, because “praise” can be another victimizing behavior by shrewd adults and it is very widely used: “oh, I count on you to be mature and not hit your little sister when she ruins your school project you have been working on all week”.

Later on, more autonomous processes are at play, to be sure. Our own personal observations, our own identifications, choices and modeling of others, and various events that may leave a positive or negative mark – these are all ways of how the “I am” of each one of us is formed, influenced, empowered or disempowered. As we grow up, go to school, we develop our own “I am’s and am nots”. But by the time we are able to form our own opinions about our self and others, not only do we already carry some “baggage” of other’s people’s opinions of us, but we have also “inherited” a way of formulating, assessing and storing these personal opinions.

What I am trying to point out in this article is a subtle yet very powerful factor that is really responsible for a lot of damage, particularly if the outside influences or our own conclusions about ourselves are negative and self-sabotaging. Language is very important as a thinking tool, in fact there can be no thinking without language, except in very rudimentary forms. And we all make a small linguistic mistake which may have tremendous cognitive and emotional consequences: the erroneous use of the verb to be.

To make this point clear, compare these two sentences: What you did was (bad, rude, inconsiderate, wonderful, clever, stupid, etc.) You are (bad, rude, inconsiderate, wonderful, clever, stupid, etc.)

Unfortunately, this fatal linguistic mistake is very commonly made in our culture, and it affects very powerfully our cognitive processes, by leading us to conclusions that are over-generalized, absolutist, rigid, all-inclusive and permanent. Once all these various “you are’s” and “I am’s” are programmed into your basic programming, your self structure, you function automatically because your subconscious has accepted these conclusions as truths and as instructions that will automatically guide your action, your sense of self, and your presence in and interaction with the world.

This same process and the same linguistic and cognitive mistake is repeated also at a wider scale. Consider:

They (as a social class, a religious group, a racial group, an ethnic group) are…

We, in our family are….

Women are…

Men are…

The world is ….

Life is ….

So, you can see how powerful this little verb can be…Perhaps, while reading this article you remembered the “you are” gifts you received in your childhood, the “I am” gifts you have given yourself since.

Take a few moments to reflect on the following questions:

• Which “you are’s” and “I am’s” in your experience do you find dysfunctional for you and would like to eliminate from your self-concept?

• What core beliefs about you and the world do you believe are hindering instead of encouraging your development and prevent you from realizing your highest potential?

• Which of your core beliefs are constructive and conducive to a healthy and happy life?

Ismini Apostoli

 

If I am built like a beach ball and weigh as much as a small family car it will be extremely stupid ………. ?

 

 

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IS THE MAIN DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WINNERS AND LOSERS?

 

What would you say is the main difference between winners and losers? I am sure you can make a mile long list of potential differences. I found that winners see failure and setbacks as temporary while losers view them as long-term or permanent disasters.

Go to any hospital and you will see how even a glimmer of hope can fuel optimism and faith in distraught family members and friends of a very sick patient. This might be a crude example, but explain why so many people can quickly recover from painful setbacks and failures while others fall apart when faced with even the slight discomfort.

The key here is that the winner’s focus on life and view setbacks as part of the game and temporary while the loser sees failure as a potentially permanent disaster. Our natural tendency is to become apathetic when we find ourselves in a real corner or when we are faced with a problem that appears un-defeatable. Once you slip into this apathetic mind-set you lose you fight and faith. Even the smallest setback or problem becomes gigantic in our minds and fill our hearts with doubt and fear.

Winners work hard to avoid this mindset. They never see setbacks or failures as permanent. They know that nothing in life is permanent. I have seen how winners go bankrupt and rise up again to become financial giants a few years later. Why I say “winners” is because they did not allow the apparent disaster to floor them permanently. They learned from their mistakes and jumped back into the arena of life better prepared. If they saw their setback as permanent they would have become struggling beggars at the table of the affluent few. It is a known fact that most successful entrepreneurs boast with at least 3-4 serious failures before the finally hit the jackpot or find something that really works for them.

WINNERS FOCUS ON WHAT THEY DO WELL

Winners concentrate on what they know they can do well. If I am built like a beach ball and weigh as much as a small family car it will be extremely stupid if I develop a burning desire to become world one-hundred meter sprint champion. If I struggled with maths since the day I went to school it will be very stupid to enrol myself at university for a degree where maths is vital in the obtaining of my degree.

What some people fail to understand is that they build disappointment into their dreams if they do not become very realistic about their strengths and weaknesses. Most of us are good at certain things and not so good at others. Winners focus on things that they know that they can do well and save themselves a lot of time and frustration. They do not labour under the illusion that you must be a champion in everything you do. If they know they are not good at maths they do not contemplate suicide if they come last in a class of sixty-five. They accept that they are pretty good at certain things and less good in others. Stop setting yourself up for failure. It is a fallacy that you must be perfect in everything you do. You might be world champion material in specific fields or disciplines, why waste your time and energy on things that obviously do not suit you.

I suffered with the fallacy that I must be outstanding at everything I do. I tore myself apart when I failed or fell short of my own and others expectations. I finally came to terms with the undisputable fact that it make much more sense to focus on what I do well and to avoid setting myself up in no-win situations. Stop trying to be perfect in everything you do. You will like most of us mortals shine in certain areas and look quite clumsy in others. You might be a brilliant salesperson, but poor in administrative work. Rather appoint an administrative clerk to manage your office so you can spend even more time at what you are really good at. I wish I understood this principle many years ago. I would have saved myself years of frustration and doubt. You will never find a lion crying his eyes out because he cannot fly like an eagle or swim like a dolphin.

Rene

 

How to Be Less Stupid

 

 

I’m really stupid. I can tell you in advance. I think at heart, if I work at it, I can be smart. But at the moment I’m largely an idiot. I feel I have the right knowledge but I let a lot of stuff get in the way. You know: “stuff”. Worries, guilt, paranoia, grudges, resentment. Like, for instance: I resent the people who resent me. I think they resent me for no reason. So now I resent them. What a circle-jerk!

 

I used to think when I added stuff to my brain I’d get smarter. But this is not true. For instance, if I look up when Charlemagne was born I’d just add a fact to my head which I will forget tomorrow. This won’t make me smarter. Subtraction, and not Addition, is what makes the window to the brain more clear, wipes away the smudges, opens the drapes.

One example: the day I lost the deal to do Tupac’s website, I had a chess lesson afterwards. I couldn’t play at all. It was like I didn’t even know the rules. My instructor said, “what’s wrong with you today?” But I was ashamed. And angry at myself. So my intelligence went way down. Like 80% down.

So here’s my great list.

Paranoia

I figure on the moments when you are paranoid (is she cheating? Is he stealing? Are they talking about me? Will they sue me? Etc) you lose about 30-50% of your intelligence. That’s a big chunk. For me, its because I can’t think of anything else. I would circle her house until the lights were on and then I’d knock on the door. Or I would go to his office and not leave until he showed up. Paranoia will destroy you.

Resentment

Someone wrote about me a year ago. I hold a grudge. He was a friend, then wrote the worst crap about me. What a jerk. But when I think about it, I figure I lose about 20% of my intelligence. Particularly if the thoughts involve revenge. Then maybe 30% of my intelligence.

Regret

I’ve written about it a billion times. I lost a lot of money in 2000-2001. I regret it. Or, I should say, I regretted it. I don’t anymore. How come? Because I saw that regret was taking at least 60% of my intelligence away. I couldn’t afford 60%. 2% I could afford. Not 60%. I didn’t start coming up with ideas for new businesses until the regret went away.

Perfectionism

When I was running a fund I never wanted to have a down month. I’d be afraid to talk to my investors then. One guy, who is still a good friend (I spoke with him today even) said, “listen, if you’re going to be a fund manager you have to be able to talk to people when you have a down month”.

But I was ashamed. When I lost my house, I moved 70 miles away. I didn’t want to run into anyone. I felt shame. When I write a blog post I think is weak, I might take it down before too many see it. I’m ashamed of it. I want to win the Nobel Prize for blog writing. Or at least 10,000 Facebook likes. But I can’t control that.

I’m imperfect. The shame of imperfectionism takes at least 20% of my intelligence away. Because people sense and appreciate honesty and honesty about imperfections, believe it or not, creates enormous opportunities. I’ve seen it happen in my own life.

Control

I want to control everything around me. But sometimes things are bad and there’s nothing you can do about it. Sometimes you have to surrender and say, “this is bad now but good things will happen later”. Then a great weight lights off your shoulders.

You know why they always say “a great weight lifts off your shoulders?” because that’s where your brain is. And your brain is heavy. It rests on your shoulders. When stuff is weighing it down you lose about 10-20% of your intelligence. Give up control and get smarter.

A simple example: you are late for a meeting but there’s traffic. You can think “God damn this traffic. Why am I always in traffic?” Or you can be thinking about something smart: like how good bacon tastes. Can I make a better bacon? Or how would I start a helicopter airline to take me from one side of the city to the other. These seem like dumb thoughts. But they are much better than “God damn this traffic!”

Guilt

A good friend of mine wrote me recently. I should say, wrote me six weeks ago. Every day when I wake up I tell myself: don’t return emails until you read, then write. But then sometimes I have other things to do. Meetings. Or BS stuff. Or eating. I say, “ok, I will return that email later.” And then when later comes I feel bad that I haven’t returned his email earlier. Then at 3am I turn over and say to Claudia, “I didn’t return that email”. She says “Urgh…ushghsh…emmmm” which was not the answer I was looking for. Then I don’t sleep as much. Then I feel guilty. That takes away about 10% of my intelligence right there.

Worst Case Scenario

Lets say I lose $1000 in the stock market one day. Sometimes I think to myself, “holy shit, if I lose that amount every day for the next….” And it gets worse and worse. My worst case scenarios has my children begging for food on the harsh streets of Bangalore. I’ve spent at least a year of my life, when you add it up, thinking of the worst case scenario. Even though the worst case scenario HAS NEVER HAPPENED. Or if it does happen, it was never as bad as I thought it would be. I have a scarcity complex. If I didn’t have that then I’d have an “abundance complex”. And I firmly believe, abundance follows an abundance complex. So I’m smarter (and wealthier) when I give up that scarcity complex.

Talking

Claudia wanted to say something important to me. But I spoke instead. I imparted my great wisdom on her before she could get a word out. Finally, she forgot what she was going to say. Probably because my words were so wise they were like the Bible. Or like Robert’s Rules of Order. Or Strunk & White. That’s how wise I am. STRUNK AND WHITE! Extra talking probably takes away at least 15% of my intelligence. Because I could’ve been listening and learning. Or reading about grammar. Or not getting into an accident when talking on the phone. Sometimes we just have to Shut Up!

Excuses

Everyone says, “I can’t.” I can’t be a medical professional unless I go to medical school. I can’t be a movie maker unless I raise $10 million to make a movie. I can’t marry a super model because I’m ugly. I can’t I can’t I can’t. For every “can’t ” you should send me $10. I can do all those things. Particularly if I have your $10.

By the way, just notice when these things come up. It’s not like you’re going to get cured of paranoia. But notice when it appears. Water withers the rock away. Every time you notice, the window clears a tiny bit. A smudge is gone. You get a glimpse of the light outside.

You get a tiny bit smarter. Maybe later you have to look for the deeper emotional reasons for why you feel the way you do. And there are a lot of reasons. Everyone could’ve made fun of your acne in junior high school and now you want to be loved by everyone. (Err, maybe that happened to me) But right now, this second, just don’t get hit by a car when you cross the street.

You can say, “hey, wait a second! All of those things equal up to more than 100%!” Well, what can I say? You’re smarter than me.

 

By James Altucher

 

I want you to sit back for a moment and think how many time in the last day or week did you think thoughts like – My partner should have or could have – My neighbour should have – My son should have – My boss should have etc.

 

 

Dear Fellow Bloggers,

 
The only reason why we suffer is because we resist, argue or fight with “what is”. When we become convinced about the facts of “what is” we stop sabotaging our ability to enjoy, progress and succeed with whatever we are busy with at any given moment.

 
If you insist in your attempt to change, modify or enjoy a different “what is” then you might as well attempt to train your dog to sing like a canary. You can try all you like, but will end up with a dog that still barks like crazy notwithstanding all your effort. Wanting your reality to be different than what you are faced with at any given moment is just stupid and a waste of time. You can send your dog for singing classes or you can hire a tutor for him, but will end up with a dog that still barks like the day he got this stupid notion in his head. All you willpower, money and effort will not provide you with the outcome you desired.

 
I want you to sit back for a moment and think how many time in the last day or week did you think thoughts like – My partner should have or could have – My neighbour should have – My son should have – My boss should have etc.

 
These thoughts clearly illustrate that you wanted reality to be different than it was or still is at this moment in time You experienced frustration, anger, anxiety, rejection and stress because you argued against the hard cold facts of “what is”.

 
You might think that you can see in what direction my message are moving and would like to tell me that if you simply accepted the reality of “what is” you would become passive and nothing would change or improve in any area of your life. If you posed this question to me I would ask you which of the following questions sound more logical and sane to you. “I wish I never made that stupid investment and lost all my money” or “What can I do, starting today to generate more income so I can make up for the money I lost?”

 
Accepting the reality of “what is” does not mean that you condone or approve of the way things are or of the behaviour of someone, it just means that you give up all your resistance and inner struggle wishing that things were different. I know that no one wants to lose his money, experience the moaning of a partner or boss or struggle with a sick child. It is however vital that you understand that it is much more helpful not to mentally argue with the reality of the moment. This might sound extremely logical, but the fact of the matter is that we have been doing this since early childhood and achieve nothing beneficial from this habitual responds pattern. We know that our resistance to “what is” is counter productive and futile, but be sustain this mode of operation and hope that one day we will achieve an acceptable outcome.

 
You will be amazed how your life will change when you learn to accept “what is”. It will not be easy initially to just accept “what is” because you have been playing this game since early childhood and your ego is of the opinion that it is the right thing to do. The problem that you are faced with is that you always lose when you play this silly game. When you argue with “what is” you always lose my friend.

 

Just awareness of this fact will bring a new perspective into the way you do things. You will stop the futile arguing and fighting against “what is”, what could or should have been. You will accept “what is” without mentally fussing and straining and start working on ways that you can avoid a repeat performance in the future. You will stop wasting energy on what you hoped or whished for. Progress is only possible when you accept “what is” and boldly start working towards the outcome you desire.

 
Kind regards

 

Rene