For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.
People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win. Tell people how you feel about them, whether you love them, disagree with them or want to help them.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly
Corra May White Haris
.
It may be difficult to accept that some singers, sport stars or public speakers suffer with fear and anxiety before they start their performances. Many of the most popular artists and sport stars still feel ill and shake with fear when they bounce onto the stage or into the arena to perform. They often hide their anxiety behind a brave smile and the artificially bolstered image that they project to their audiences. A friend told me that many of a newsreader’s heartbeats goes as high as two hundred beats a minute the moment when they cross over for the news. I have been giving motivational and educational speeches for half a lifetime and still feel tension when I walk to the podium.
It is a known fact that most people are afraid of public speaking. I can still remember a nightmare I had before I gave my first paid public speech. In this dream I saw how I made a complete fool of myself. I saw how I stuttered fumbled my way through the whole speech. I could see the shock on the audience’s faces. I even save a few at the back of the hall rolling with laughter. It took an iron will and a serious self-talk to prepare myself for my virgin paid performance.
The key to courage is to proceed and do what needs to be done notwithstanding the uncontrollable feelings that rush through your body and brain. The most difficult thing in overcoming fear is to activate action. Once you passed this hurdle the rest is usually much easier. I found when I play in an important rugby match that all the nervousness disappeared the moment I crossed the outside perimeter of the field.
Most champions feel just as much fear, anxiety and tension than we do, but they learned how to manage their fear. Courage is not something that you are born with. Courage is simply to do what needs to be done regardless of the panic feelings. You must take a firm step forward when your name is called. The key is to master the fear during the first critical moments. Once you get going nothing will ever stop you.
COURAGE IS THE FINAL TEST TO SEE IF YOU QUALIFY FOR THE BENEFITS THAT ARE USUALLY ONLY DISHED OUT TO THE BRAVE.
George Farquhar said, “Courage – an independent spark by which the soul stands raised. When you stand up against a bully and survive your moment of perceived madness, you feel proud of your achievement. When you tell you boss in no uncertain terms that you will no longer be his slave or allow his manipulation, you usually go home and feel proud of your fortitude. You might buy the evening newspaper on your way home so you can find a new job, but usually feel proud that you for once stood up for your rights.
Courage is not something that only some people are blessed with. Courage is simply as stated above an emotion that you need to overcome. I have seen how brave woman lay down their lives for their children. I have seen a wounded buffalo cow stand up to a lion to protect her calf. We all have courage that is stored deep inside our souls. It is there, waiting for you to discover and use it to your advantage.
You will not make much progress in the game of life if you lack courage and will power. The courageous always walk away with the best jobs, opportunities and benefits. They earn the biggest incomes. They are paid well because they mastered the enemy called fear. I am sharing their secret with you today. They are just as frightened as you are. They also taste the fear, but walk forward and face the fear until it loses its hold over them. It is a fallacy that they feel no fear. People that feel no fear in the face of adversity are usually idiots with a short lifespan.
Stop blaming everybody for your failures. You are ultimately in control of your own destiny. There is a fallacy that it is a disgrace to fail. Failure is not the end of the road, but simply an indicator that you still have certain lessons to learn. Failure is your built in alarm system that detects when you need to put in some additional work in a specific area. It is not the kiss of death to your hopes and dreams.
Stop calling it bad luck or some kind of conspiracy when you are actually the one that gave up on your dreams. Dreams without a constructive plan action are a total waste of time. Dreams can be compared to a seed. Only when this seed is watered (action) and nurtured (work) will it turn into a mature plant that can feed your family.
Stop focusing on your own needs for a while if you want to expand your influence at a rapid and spectacular pace. Only when you sincerely become interested in people will you see, feel, and hear who they really are. Our minds are so flooded with prejudice and preconceived perceptions that our mental growth is put on hold at a very young age. We lost our ability to listen a long time ago and only give attention to what others say when we feel that there might be something for us in the deal.
Stop taking people, your goals and projects so seriously. I found that a focused approach and a “no fear of loss” attitude take you a long way towards a successful and happy life. How can you enjoy your successes if you never knew failure? Give things your best shot and go for gold every time. You will win some and lose some, but you will feel alive and part of the game of life. Learn to say, “so what” when things fail to work out as expected. Learn to see the humour in your failures. Remember when you cry, you cry alone.
Stop waiting for others to earn your approval and love. Go out and show your love for others unconditionally. It is your fear that is holding you back. Take off your protective gear and show your feelings my friend or you will never experience real happiness and true love. It takes courage to expose yourself to potential rejection and failure, but champions do not succumb to their fear!
Stop wasting your time trying to understand why people act the way they do. They are inhabitants of the outer world. You have ownership and control of your own world, but not of the outer world. You will tire and deplete yourself in the process and set yourself up for failure if you attempt to control or adjust the outer world. Accept that no permanent control is possible in the outer world. The governments, police and the armies of all the nations on the planet cannot fully control this world’s inhabitants. What makes you think that you can?
Use the following method and power words when you are searching for new ideas or fresh perspectives. They say that the difference between a rut and the grave is about six feet. Many of us slip into a groove and continue to play out our lives until change is forced on us. Nothing new can be created until you work up enough desire and courage to change something. Everything will stay the same until you change the current recipe.
Creativity comes to those that are not afraid of the unknown. Inventors and innovators dare to go where nobody went before. They think of ways to achieve a specific objective or solve a problem that later seem so logical, but that have been ignored because it challenged the current rules. No progress is possible while you sustain methods and systems that might be outdated and defective.
The golden rule is to remain vigilant for fresh ideas all the time. Most of the biggest inventions came about when someone identified a problem and allowed his mind to come up with a solution. Many of us become passive or panic we are faced with a potential problem. The innovators love problems and do not view them as barriers. They see them, as wonderful opportunities to improve or create something brand new that will make certain problems go away.
The innovators are responsible for everything that you see when you look out of the window. They saw solutions while the rest of the people remained focused on the problems. Your mind is a powerful computer that is connected to the universal mind. There is an unlimited resource of data stored in the universal mind’s archives. Creative people tap these archives and often come up with amazing inventions. Individuals that are not even connected to a specific industry come up with ideas that stun those that have been working there for years.
Use the following method and power word the next time that you are faced with a problem or barrier. Focus on the situation, problem or obstacle and repeat the power word “create”. This power word will activate a creative process in your mind.
You will soon discover that your mind will begin to search for solutions where it possibly in the past could only dig up hundreds of reasons why something just cannot be done. You will soon find that several options will come to mind when you trigger your inventive power by using the word “create”.
You are a creator in your own right. You have been creating for many years. Look around you and become aware of the many things you created to date. You created your own world and circumstances. Your historical mindset directed what you created in all areas of your life. The choices that you made historically formed the base of what you have today.
You can spend your time creating wonderful innovations or you can waste it creating excuses why certain things cannot be done. Repeat the word “create” the next time that you need a solution to a problem. You will soon discover that you will have several options or combinations of ideas that could assist you to overcome what you are faced with.
The key is to focus on the outcome you desire. The power word “create” will cause creative chemicals to be released by your brain. You will suddenly think solutions and not problems like you have possibly done in the past.
I suggest that you make notes of all ideas that surface after you used the power word “create”. Do not judge what come to mind. You will be able to later use one or a combination of the ideas that surfaced to “create” a solution to the problem. Remember you can use this system to innovate and “create” even when you have no immediate problems that need your urgent attention.
Repeat this power word when you are faced with a problem or challenge that you would like to overcome. Create. Create. Create.
Possible other power words you can use: Solution. Solution. Explore. Explore. Innovate. Innovate.
Rene
.
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For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.
People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win. Tell people how you feel about them, whether you love them, disagree with them or want to help them.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
There is a misconception that courageous people fight lions or crocodiles with their bare hands, jump out of aeroplanes or over cliffs or play with snakes that could kill them in seconds. It often takes more courage to say something that need to be said than any of the above. A person that lacks courage feel that he/she is up against a solid brick wall when important things need to be expressed that could impact on their relationship.
What such individuals fail to understand is that their lack of courage is creating a void between them and their man/woman. The lack of courage create separation that could in time topple their relationship. The frustration and anger often experienced in relationships can be traced back to a lack of courage. Things become extremely complicated when one of the partners suffer with a lack of courage, but things get worse when both parties lack courage expect their partner to do mind reading.
.
.
Direct and fearless communication bring people together and remove the stuff that partners often just speculate about. It is healthy to express negative and positive emotions. There is nothing wrong when you express your anger or frustration as long as it is done in a mature manner. Your partner then get the opportunity to see what is really bothering you and can attempt to rectify possible misunderstandings.
.
.
The courage to say how you feel about your partner when it comes to love is vital. It is silly to expect your partner to guess or decode that you love him/her if they carefully study your actions. Be brave and tell it like it is. When you love stop hinting and stop leaving it to your partner to solve the puzzle. You might think that you are mystical when you do this, but I can tell you that it is a dangerous game that you are playing. Your man/woman might run into someone that don’t lack courage that can express him/herself in a clear and precise manner when it comes to love. To summarize we need to remember that communication reduce distance while the lack of courage in turn create massive voids. Why spend so many hours bridge building when you can bridge the gap in moments when you tell it like it is?
To accomplish (1) great things we must not only act (2), but also dream (3), not only plan (4), but also believe (5).
Anatole France
The word accomplish is not always fully understood by people. The word (1) accomplish signifies to finish, complete or bring something to an end. You cannot claim that you accomplished your goal or objective if you do not bring something to a successful conclusion. Most people are excellent at starting things, but the real winners in life understand that without completion there is no reason to celebrate.
You might plant your seeds in the garden of life, but if you fail to follow through you will not reap the fruit of your labour. Everything that is worthwhile accomplishing starts with a dream (3). Most of the wonderful inventions you see around you today started with an idea in the head of someone. When the idea is transformed into a dream it is given the opportunity to materialize. Most people allow their ideas and dreams to die unceremoniously in their heads.
Most of the most brilliant inventions never got past the dream stage because their owners never acted (2) on their inspirations. The best books were never written because the potential authors could not summon up enough courage to write the first page. If you want to make your dreams a reality you need to think up a plan (4) to take it past the dream stage.
Only a few people get past their own negative self-talk. Most people do not have the courage and fortitude to take something through to a successful conclusion. Friends and family are excellent flaw finders, but usually do not have any plans of their own. Most of them resigned themselves to what they call their “fate” in life and know that they will remain just a face in the crowd of faceless mediocre people.
When you listen to the fainthearted you will become one of their clan. You will see danger and failure in every shadow. It takes courage and lots of faith in your ideas, dreams and plans if you want to take them through to a successful conclusion. You must believe (5) if you want to achieve. You must not allow negative thinkers to shoot down your plans and goals.
They say faith can move mountains. When you really believe in your mission you will overcome all obstacles that attempt to prevent you from achieving your objectives.
.
I WILL ACCOMPLISH ANY TASK THAT I FOCUS ON BECAUSE I AM DETERMINED AND MOTIVATED. I WILL PERSIST UNTIL MY DREAM BECOMES A REALITY!
.
.
You are the creator of your own successes and failures. The choices that you make will lead you toward or away from your goals and dreams. The cowards are afraid to act because they fear failure. The winners accept that failure is not a destination, but simply a part of the process. Nothing worthwhile was ever achieved without serious effort and painful failures. All that failure indicates to you is that you still need to make a few modifications to your plan. Failures expect their plans to work without a hitch and fall apart if the don’t. Winners expect setbacks and do not allow them to deflate their initial passion and commitment. Winners do not allow the negative comments of friends and enemies to dismantle their dreams and plans.
If you have been walking around for years with a good idea in your head, now may be a good time to activate some serious action to make it a reality. I do not claim that it will be easy or that all your dreams will become a reality, but why not give some of them your best shot? How would you feel if you read in a magazine or newspaper, that someone else made millions with a similar idea than the one you have allowed to hibernate in your mind?
You need to stop living your life having regrets for things in your past. Constantly thinking about events from your past that you aren’t proud of, mistakes you may have made in your relationships, or things you “should have” done isn’t going to make your future any better. You need to accept where you are in your life for what it is, and learn from your “mistakes”. No matter how bad you view something from your past to be, take the time to really find something positive from it. Look hard. There is something there.
Things are going to happen to you. They happen to everybody. It’s how you deal with them that allows you to grow as a person and an overall happier human being. If you’re able to find just one positive from an event, you will grow. Consider this example:
Say you’re in college and your friends invite you out for a few beers. However, you have a big exam the next day. You’ve studied for weeks and are certain of all the material that’s going to be on the exam. You decide to go because you heard that cute guy or girl you’ve had your eye on is going to be there. You have a few beers and finally get the courage to do some flirting. After a few more beers, you’re pretty drunk and decide you need to go home. You catch a few hours sleep and take your exam. Long story short, you fail the exam because you made a bad decision to go out the night before. You feel complete disappointment in yourself, which you should. However, instead of moping around about it, learn from your mistake and move on with your life. Realize that your hard work doesn’t pay off unless you complete the project. Studying for weeks for the exam was wasted for a night out of fun. Learn what you need to do to accomplish the goals you set out for yourself, and stay disciplined until you have successfully completed what you set out to do.
To take that first move toward to a new positive way of pursuing life, try the following:
Make a list of the events from your life that you continue to dwell on and can’t seem to let go of.
For each event, write down what your mistake was, what you learned from this mistake, and something positive you have today because of the situation.
Let go of it!
If you are able to release the binds of the past and start to live for today, you will start to feel a happiness that is very rewarding. What’s in the past, is in the past. It cannot be undone. Apply your energy to today and appreciate the life that you have.
There is a misconception that courageous people fight lions or crocodiles with their bare hands, jump out of planes or over cliffs or play with snakes that could kill them in seconds. It often takes more courage to say something that need to be said than any of the above. A person that lacks courage feel that he/she is up against a solid brick wall when important things need to be expressed that could impact on their relationship.
What such individuals fail to understand is that their lack of courage is creating a void between them and their man/woman. The lack of courage create separation that could in time topple their relationship. The frustration and anger often experienced in relationships can be traced back to a lack of courage. Things become extremely complicated when one of the partners suffer with a lack of courage, but things get worse when both parties lack courage expect their partner to do mind reading.
Direct and fearless communication bring people together and remove the stuff that partners often just speculate about. It is healthy to express negative and positive emotions. There is nothing wrong when you express your anger or frustration as long as it is done in a mature manner. Your partner then get the opportunity to see what is really bothering you and can attempt to rectify possible misunderstandings.
The courage to say how you feel about your partner when it comes to love is vital. It is silly to expect your partner to guess or decode that you love him/her if they carefully study your actions. Be brave and tell it like it is. When you love stop hinting and stop leaving it to your partner to solve the puzzle. You might think that you are mystical when you do this, but I can tell you that it is a dangerous game that you are playing. Your man/woman might run into someone that don’t lack courage that can express him/herself in a clear and precise manner when it comes to love. To summarize we need to remember that communication reduce distance while the lack of courage in turn create massive voids. Why spend so many hours bridge building when you can bridge the gap in moments when you tell it like it is?
To accomplish (1) great things we must not only act (2), but also dream (3), not only plan (4), but also believe (5).
Anatole France
The word accomplish is not always fully understood by people. The word (1) accomplish signifies to finish, complete or bring something to an end. You cannot claim that you accomplished your goal or objective if you do not bring something to a successful conclusion. Most people are excellent at starting things, but the real winners in life understand that without completion there is no reason to celebrate.
You might plant your seeds in the garden of life, but if you fail to follow through you will not reap the fruit of your labour. Everything that is worthwhile accomplishing starts with a dream (3). Most of the wonderful inventions you see around you today started with an idea in the head of someone. When the idea is transformed into a dream it is given the opportunity to materialize. Most people allow their ideas and dreams to die unceremoniously in their heads.
Most of the most brilliant inventions never got past the dream stage because their owners never acted (2) on their inspirations. The best books were never written because the potential authors could not summon up enough courage to write the first page. If you want to make your dreams a reality you need to think up a plan (4) to take it past the dream stage.
Only a few people get past their own negative self-talk. Most people do not have the courage and fortitude to take something through to a successful conclusion. Friends and family are excellent flaw finders, but usually do not have any plans of their own. Most of them resigned themselves to what they call their “fate” in life and know that they will remain just a face in the crowd of faceless mediocre people.
When you listen to the fainthearted you will become one of their clan. You will see danger and failure in every shadow. It takes courage and lots of faith in your ideas, dreams and plans if you want to take them through to a successful conclusion. You must believe (5) if you want to achieve. You must not allow negative thinkers to shoot down your plans and goals.
They say faith can move mountains. When you really believe in your mission you will overcome all obstacles that attempt to prevent you from achieving your objectives.
.
I WILL ACCOMPLISH ANY TASK THAT I FOCUS ON BECAUSE I AM DETERMINED AND MOTIVATED. I WILL PERSIST UNTIL MY DREAM BECOMES A REALITY!
.
You are the creator of your own successes and failures. The choices that you make will lead you toward or away from your goals and dreams. The cowards are afraid to act because they fear failure. The winners accept that failure is not a destination, but simply a part of the process. Nothing worthwhile was ever achieved without serious effort and painful failures. All that failure indicates to you is that you still need to make a few modifications to your plan. Failures expect their plans to work without a hitch and fall apart if the don’t. Winners expect setbacks and do not allow them to deflate their initial passion and commitment. Winners do not allow the negative comments of friends and enemies to dismantle their dreams and plans.
If you have been walking around for years with a good idea in your head, now may be a good time to activate some serious action to make it a reality. I do not claim that it will be easy or that all your dreams will become a reality, but why not give some of them your best shot? How would you feel if you read in a magazine or newspaper, that someone else made millions with a similar idea than the one you have allowed to hibernate in your mind?
There is a misconception that courageous people fight lions or crocodiles with their bare hands, jump out of airplanes or over cliffs or play with snakes that could kill them in seconds. It often takes more courage to say something that need to be said than any of the above. A person that lacks courage feel that he/she is up against a solid brick wall when important things need to be expressed that could impact on their relationship.
What such individuals fail to understand is that their lack of courage is creating a void between them and their man/woman. The lack of courage create separation that could in time topple their relationship. The frustration and anger often experienced in relationships can be traced back to a lack of courage. Things become extremely complicated when one of the partners suffer with a lack of courage, but things get worse when both parties lack courage expect their partner to do mind reading.
Direct and fearless communication bring people together and remove the stuff that partners often just speculate about. It is healthy to express negative and positive emotions. There is nothing wrong when you express your anger or frustration as long as it is done in a mature manner. Your partner then get the opportunity to see what is really bothering you and can attempt to rectify possible misunderstandings.
The courage to say how you feel about your partner when it comes to love is vital. It is silly to expect your partner to guess or decode that you love him/her if they carefully study your actions. Be brave and tell it like it is. When you love stop hinting and stop leaving it to your partner to solve the puzzle. You might think that you are mystical when you do this, but I can tell you that it is a dangerous game that you are playing. Your man/woman might run into someone that don’t lack courage that can express him/herself in a clear and precise manner when it comes to love. To summarize we need to remember that communication reduce distance while the lack of courage in turn create massive voids. Why spend so many hours bridge building when you can bridge the gap in moments when you tell it like it is?
Rene
.
.
.
Note: I am no expert in democracy and can thus not express a scientifically proven opinion in this regard, but I noticed the following when countries gained so-called freedom. (Example – South Africa). It soon became clear to me that it is not so much about freedom and liberation from historical domination and oppression, but the yearning for POWER and control. We have many examples in Africa and elsewhere that clearly shows that freedom and democracy are often mostly an illusion. Superficial changes are made, but the poor and the homeless voters remain bottom feeders in the newly created social democratic structure. Those that are lucky enough to slot in at the top of the feeding chain and are close to the POWER source experience massive changes in status and quality of life while the middle and especially the lower class continue as before.
The point that I am making is that any democratic system where a single group (race, party, religious or otherwise) gain the upper hand because of numbers are doomed to failure. A democratic management structure where you have one single party that control almost everything is unhealthy and usually leads to a wide range of serious problems. One form of domination and oppression is simply replaced with a new form of slavery. (All you really have is a changing of the guard) The disadvantaged continue to struggle and strain without jobs, housing and services notwithstanding the promises made by enthusiastic political leaders. The perceived freedom financial benefits promised to the previous oppressed is often just an illusion.
What I have against a democratic system where one group are dominant is that individuals are often appointed in leadership roles that simply don’t have the ability, skills and know-how when it comes to the task expected from such individual. The blind often leads the blind and ignorant. The only way that any democracy can become a vibrant system is where individuals can be rapidly replaced when they fail to achieve the desired or promised objectives. It is only when a country is run like a business by competent and accountable leaders that understand their obligation towards all citizens that country flourish and grow. Democracy must never be allowed to become a weapon in the hands of a specific group (party, race, religion etc.)
For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.
People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win. Tell people how you feel about them, whether you love them, disagree with them or want to help them.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly
Corra May White Haris
.
It may be difficult to accept that some singers, sport stars or public speakers suffer with fear and anxiety before they start their performances. Many of the most popular artists and sport stars still feel ill and shake with fear when they bounce onto the stage or into the arena to perform. They often hide their anxiety behind a brave smile and the artificially bolstered image that they project to their audiences. A friend told me that many of a newsreader’s heartbeats goes as high as two hundred beats a minute the moment when they cross over for the news. I have been giving motivational and educational speeches for half a lifetime and still feel tension when I walk to the podium.
It is a known fact that most people are afraid of public speaking. I can still remember a nightmare I had before I gave my first paid public speech. In this dream I saw how I made a complete fool of myself. I saw how I stuttered fumbled my way through the whole speech. I could see the shock on the audience’s faces. I even save a few at the back of the hall rolling with laughter. It took an iron will and a serious self-talk to prepare myself for my virgin paid performance.
The key to courage is to proceed and do what needs to be done notwithstanding the uncontrollable feelings that rush through your body and brain. The most difficult thing in overcoming fear is to activate action. Once you passed this hurdle the rest is usually much easier. I found when I play in an important rugby match that all the nervousness disappeared the moment I crossed the outside perimeter of the field.
Most champions feel just as much fear, anxiety and tension than we do, but they learned how to manage their fear. Courage is not something that you are born with. Courage is simply to do what needs to be done regardless of the panic feelings. You must take a firm step forward when your name is called. The key is to master the fear during the first critical moments. Once you get going nothing will ever stop you.
COURAGE IS THE FINAL TEST TO SEE IF YOU QUALIFY FOR THE BENEFITS THAT ARE USUALLY ONLY DISHED OUT TO THE BRAVE.
George Farquhar said, “Courage – an independent spark by which the soul stands raised. When you stand up against a bully and survive your moment of perceived madness, you feel proud of your achievement. When you tell you boss in no uncertain terms that you will no longer be his slave or allow his manipulation, you usually go home and feel proud of your fortitude. You might buy the evening newspaper on your way home so you can find a new job, but usually feel proud that you for once stood up for your rights.
Courage is not something that only some people are blessed with. Courage is simply as stated above an emotion that you need to overcome. I have seen how brave woman lay down their lives for their children. I have seen a wounded buffalo cow stand up to a lion to protect her calf. We all have courage that is stored deep inside our souls. It is there, waiting for you to discover and use it to your advantage.
You will not make much progress in the game of life if you lack courage and will power. The courageous always walk away with the best jobs, opportunities and benefits. They earn the biggest incomes. They are paid well because they mastered the enemy called fear. I am sharing their secret with you today. They are just as frightened as you are. They also taste the fear, but walk forward and face the fear until it loses its hold over them. It is a fallacy that they feel no fear. People that feel no fear in the face of adversity are usually idiots with a short lifespan.
There is a misconception that courageous people fight lions or crocodiles with their bare hands, jump out of airplanes or over cliffs or play with snakes that could kill them in seconds. It often takes more courage to say something that need to be said than any of the above. A person that lacks courage feel that he/she is up against a solid brick wall when important things need to be expressed that could impact on their relationship.
What such individuals fail to understand is that their lack of courage is creating a void between them and their man/woman. The lack of courage create separation that could in time topple their relationship. The frustration and anger often experienced in relationships can be traced back to a lack of courage. Things become extremely complicated when one of the partners suffer with a lack of courage, but things get worse when both parties lack courage expect their partner to do mind reading.
Direct and fearless communication bring people together and remove the stuff that partners often just speculate about. It is healthy to express negative and positive emotions. There is nothing wrong when you express your anger or frustration as long as it is done in a mature manner. Your partner then get the opportunity to see what is really bothering you and can attempt to rectify possible misunderstandings.
The courage to say how you feel about your partner when it comes to love is vital. It is silly to expect your partner to guess or decode that you love him/her if they carefully study your actions. Be brave and tell it like it is. When you love stop hinting and stop leaving it to your partner to solve the puzzle. You might think that you are mystical when you do this, but I can tell you that it is a dangerous game that you are playing. Your man/woman might run into someone that don’t lack courage that can express him/herself in a clear and precise manner when it comes to love. To summarize we need to remember that communication reduce distance while the lack of courage in turn create massive voids. Why spend so many hours bridge building when you can bridge the gap in moments when you tell it like it is?
There is a misconception that courageous people fight lions or crocodiles with their bare hands, jump out of airplanes or over cliffs or play with snakes that could kill them in seconds. It often takes more courage to say something that need to be said than any of the above. A person that lacks courage feel that he/she is up against a solid brick wall when important things need to be expressed that could impact on their relationship.
What such individuals fail to understand is that their lack of courage is creating a void between them and their man/woman. The lack of courage create separation that could in time topple their relationship. The frustration and anger often experienced in relationships can be traced back to a lack of courage. Things become extremely complicated when one of the partners suffer with a lack of courage, but things get worse when both parties lack courage expect their partner to do mind reading.
Direct and fearless communication bring people together and remove the stuff that partners often just speculate about. It is healthy to express negative and positive emotions. There is nothing wrong when you express your anger or frustration as long as it is done in a mature manner. Your partner then get the opportunity to see what is really bothering you and can attempt to rectify possible misunderstandings.
The courage to say how you feel about your partner when it comes to love is vital. It is silly to expect your partner to guess or decode that you love him/her if they carefully study your actions. Be brave and tell it like it is. When you love stop hinting and stop leaving it to your partner to solve the puzzle. You might think that you are mystical when you do this, but I can tell you that it is a dangerous game that you are playing. Your man/woman might run into someone that don’t lack courage that can express him/herself in a clear and precise manner when it comes to love. To summarize we need to remember that communication reduce distance while the lack of courage in turn create massive voids. Why spend so many hours bridge building when you can bridge the gap in moments when you tell it like it is?
Rene
.
Note: I am no expert in democracy and can thus not express a scientifically proven opinion in this regard, but I noticed the following when countries gained so-called freedom. (Example – South Africa). It soon became clear to me that it is not so much about freedom and liberation from historical domination and oppression, but the yearning for POWER and control. We have many examples in Africa and elsewhere that clearly shows that freedom and democracy are often mostly an illusion. Superficial changes are made, but the poor and the homeless voters remain bottom feeders in the newly created social democratic structure. Those that are lucky enough to slot in at the top of the feeding chain and are close to the POWER source experience massive changes in status and quality of life while the middle and especially the lower class continue as before.
The point that I am making is that any democratic system where a single group (race, party, religious or otherwise) gain the upper hand because of numbers are doomed to failure. A democratic management structure where you have one single party that control almost everything is unhealthy and usually leads to a wide range of serious problems. One form of domination and oppression is simply replaced with a new form of slavery. (All you really have is a changing of the guard) The disadvantaged continue to struggle and strain without jobs, housing and services notwithstanding the promises made by enthusiastic political leaders. The perceived freedom financial benefits promised to the previous oppressed is often just an illusion.
What I have against a democratic system where one group are dominant is that individuals are often appointed in leadership roles that simply don’t have the ability, skills and know-how when it comes to the task expected from such individual. The blind often leads the blind and ignorant. The only way that any democracy can become a vibrant system is where individuals can be rapidly replaced when they fail to achieve the desired or promised objectives. It is only when a country is run like a business by competent and accountable leaders that understand their obligation towards all citizens that country flourish and grow. Democracy must never be allowed to become a weapon in the hands of a specific group (party, race, religion etc.)
The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly
Corra May White Haris
.
It may be difficult to accept that some singers, sport stars or public speakers suffer with fear and anxiety before they start their performances. Many of the most popular artists and sport stars still feel ill and shake with fear when they bounce onto the stage or into the arena to perform. They often hide their anxiety behind a brave smile and the artificially bolstered image that they project to their audiences. A friend told me that many of a newsreader’s heartbeats goes as high as two hundred beats a minute the moment when they cross over for the news. I have been giving motivational and educational speeches for half a lifetime and still feel tension when I walk to the podium.
It is a known fact that most people are afraid of public speaking. I can still remember a nightmare I had before I gave my first paid public speech. In this dream I saw how I made a complete fool of myself. I saw how I stuttered fumbled my way through the whole speech. I could see the shock on the audience’s faces. I even save a few at the back of the hall rolling with laughter. It took an iron will and a serious self-talk to prepare myself for my virgin paid performance.
The key to courage is to proceed and do what needs to be done notwithstanding the uncontrollable feelings that rush through your body and brain. The most difficult thing in overcoming fear is to activate action. Once you passed this hurdle the rest is usually much easier. I found when I play in an important rugby match that all the nervousness disappeared the moment I crossed the outside perimeter of the field.
Most champions feel just as much fear, anxiety and tension than we do, but they learned how to manage their fear. Courage is not something that you are born with. Courage is simply to do what needs to be done regardless of the panic feelings. You must take a firm step forward when your name is called. The key is to master the fear during the first critical moments. Once you get going nothing will ever stop you.
COURAGE IS THE FINAL TEST TO SEE IF YOU QUALIFY FOR THE BENEFITS THAT ARE USUALLY ONLY DISHED OUT TO THE BRAVE.
George Farquhar said, “Courage – an independent spark by which the soul stands raised. When you stand up against a bully and survive your moment of perceived madness, you feel proud of your achievement. When you tell you boss in no uncertain terms that you will no longer be his slave or allow his manipulation, you usually go home and feel proud of your fortitude. You might buy the evening newspaper on your way home so you can find a new job, but usually feel proud that you for once stood up for your rights.
Courage is not something that only some people are blessed with. Courage is simply as stated above an emotion that you need to overcome. I have seen how brave woman lay down their lives for their children. I have seen a wounded buffalo cow stand up to a lion to protect her calf. We all have courage that is stored deep inside our souls. It is there, waiting for you to discover and use it to your advantage.
You will not make much progress in the game of life if you lack courage and will power. The courageous always walk away with the best jobs, opportunities and benefits. They earn the biggest incomes. They are paid well because they mastered the enemy called fear. I am sharing their secret with you today. They are just as frightened as you are. They also taste the fear, but walk forward and face the fear until it loses its hold over them. It is a fallacy that they feel no fear. People that feel no fear in the face of adversity are usually idiots with a short lifespan.
Many of us are of the opinion that we need to sacrifice ourselves to gain the approval of others. You did not come to this dimension to be the slave of anyone. The problem that you are faced with is that when you sacrifice yourself for anyone you are actually doing this for the perceptions that this person hold about you or about life in general. It is helpful to know that perceptions are nothing more than the opinion held by a person. These opinions might sound solid and feasible compare to your own perceptions. Both your own opinions and the opinions of the one that you are sacrificing yourself for may be far removed from reality and the truth of the matter at hand. It is often our fear of just being ourselves that cause us to attempt to act in a way far different to who we really are. It is often fear of loss or failure that is at the root of these sacrifices that we make. Courage will assist you to see things as they really are. You will stop perceiving things through a filter that warp and bend stuff according to those that expect us to be their sacrificial lamb. Trying to win or retain the approval of anyone is a very draining exercise. You act and react far outside your usual character in an attempt to impress or gain the approval of the recipient of your sacrifice. You get up tired and you drop into bed totally exhausted when you find yourself trapped in this deadly cycle. The solution is to be the best you that you can be at any moment in time. Should anyone find your natural self unacceptable or not to his or her liking then he or she will just have to get over it. I would suggest that you drop enforced behaviour right now my friend. You are better off alone than being the sacrificial lamb of those that want to change you into something that you are not.
Stop blaming everybody for your failures. You are ultimately in control of your own destiny. There is a fallacy that it is a disgrace to fail. Failure is not the end of the road, but simply an indicator that you still have certain lessons to learn. Failure is your built in alarm system that detects when you need to put in some additional work in a specific area. It is not the kiss of death to your hopes and dreams.
Stop calling it bad luck or some kind of conspiracy when you are actually the one that gave up on your dreams. Dreams without a constructive plan action are a total waste of time. Dreams can be compared to a seed. Only when this seed is watered (action) and nurtured (work) will it turn into a mature plant that can feed your family.
Stop focusing on your own needs for a while if you want to expand your influence at a rapid and spectacular pace. Only when you sincerely become interested in people will you see, feel, and hear who they really are. Our minds are so flooded with prejudice and preconceived perceptions that our mental growth is put on hold at a very young age. We lost our ability to listen a long time ago and only give attention to what others say when we feel that there might be something for us in the deal.
Stop taking people, your goals and projects so seriously. I found that a focused approach and a “no fear of loss” attitude take you a long way towards a successful and happy life. How can you enjoy your successes if you never knew failure? Give things your best shot and go for gold every time. You will win some and lose some, but you will feel alive and part of the game of life. Learn to say, “so what” when things fail to work out as expected. Learn to see the humour in your failures. Remember when you cry, you cry alone.
Stop waiting for others to earn your approval and love. Go out and show your love for others unconditionally. It is your fear that is holding you back. Take off your protective gear and show your feelings my friend or you will never experience real happiness and true love. It takes courage to expose yourself to potential rejection and failure, but champions do not succumb to their fear!
Stop wasting your time trying to understand why people act the way they do. They are inhabitants of the outer world. You have ownership and control of your own world, but not of the outer world. You will tire and deplete yourself in the process and set yourself up for failure if you attempt to control or adjust the outer world. Accept that no permanent control is possible in the outer world. The governments, police and the armies of all the nations on the planet cannot fully control this world’s inhabitants. What makes you think that you can?
The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly
.Corra May White Haris
.
It may be difficult to accept that some singers, sport stars or public speakers suffer with fear and anxiety before they start their performances. Many of the most popular artists and sport stars still feel ill and shake with fear when they bounce onto the stage or into the arena to perform. They often hide their anxiety behind a brave smile and the artificially bolstered image that they project to their audiences. A friend told me that many of a newsreader’s heartbeats goes as high as two hundred beats a minute the moment when they cross over for the news. I have been giving motivational and educational speeches for half a lifetime and still feel tension when I walk to the podium.
It is a known fact that most people are afraid of public speaking. I can still remember a nightmare I had before I gave my first paid public speech. In this dream I saw how I made a complete fool of myself. I saw how I stuttered fumbled my way through the whole speech. I could see the shock on the audience’s faces. I even save a few at the back of the hall rolling with laughter. It took an iron will and a serious self-talk to prepare myself for my virgin paid performance.
The key to courage is to proceed and do what needs to be done notwithstanding the uncontrollable feelings that rush through your body and brain. The most difficult thing in overcoming fear is to activate action. Once you passed this hurdle the rest is usually much easier. I found when I play in an important rugby match that all the nervousness disappeared the moment I crossed the outside perimeter of the field.
Most champions feel just as much fear, anxiety and tension than we do, but they learned how to manage their fear. Courage is not something that you are born with. Courage is simply to do what needs to be done regardless of the panic feelings. You must take a firm step forward when your name is called. The key is to master the fear during the first critical moments. Once you get going nothing will ever stop you.
.
COURAGE IS THE FINAL TEST TO SEE IF YOU QUALIFY FOR THE BENEFITS THAT ARE USUALLY ONLY DISHED OUT TO THE BRAVE.
.
George Farquhar said, “Courage – an independent spark by which the soul stands raised. When you stand up against a bully and survive your moment of perceived madness, you feel proud of your achievement. When you tell you boss in no uncertain terms that you will no longer be his slave or allow his manipulation, you usually go home and feel proud of your fortitude. You might buy the evening newspaper on your way home so you can find a new job, but usually feel proud that you for once stood up for your rights.
Courage is not something that only some people are blessed with. Courage is simply as stated above an emotion that you need to overcome. I have seen how brave woman lay down their lives for their children. I have seen a wounded buffalo cow stand up to a lion to protect her calf. We all have courage that is stored deep inside our souls. It is there, waiting for you to discover and use it to your advantage.
You will not make much progress in the game of life if you lack courage and will power. The courageous always walk away with the best jobs, opportunities and benefits. They earn the biggest incomes. They are paid well because they mastered the enemy called fear. I am sharing their secret with you today. They are just as frightened as you are. They also taste the fear, but walk forward and face the fear until it loses its hold over them. It is a fallacy that they feel no fear. People that feel no fear in the face of adversity are usually idiots with a short lifespan.
.It is mind blowing to see what hardship and distress some of us need to go through before we wake up to the fact that we are trapped in a state of NON-ACTION by our fear. How many of our relationships must be destroyed by our inability to do what need to be done or say what we desire to say before we grab resistance by the throat. We resist our feelings in our relationships because our partner might gain the upper hand or get the wrong impression of us. A person or partner treat us like shit and we just stand there and bite our tongues. We are too afraid to take drastic and sustained action because we are afraid that he or she might leave us. We remain in a toxic relationship because we are afraid that we might end up lonely in a flat with only a big fat cat and a canary to keep us company. We yearn for success, money and affluence, but do little or nothing that can move us towards our desires and dreams. We are so afraid that we might fail that we remain in a sustained state of hibernation. Many of us want to write a book, play or paint something, but we fail to lift a finger because we allow the fog of resistance to cloud our mind. What are we waiting for? Who do we think will come and rescue us or break down the door to come and give us a job or show us that we are worthy? The fog of resistance clouds our judgement and ability to walk tall and play to win. This feeling or force that kept many of us prisoner since early childhood has no power to bind us. We are its power source. It feeds off our fear of failing or getting hurt. It is recharged every time we allow doubt to clasp its slimy cold fingers around our hearts. Do you know why many outperform us in business, relationships and entrepreneurial ventures? I am sad to report that they have nothing that you don’t have other than the courage to walk forward in the face of adversity. Champions also feel the fear, but they have that little something that override their fear. Their hearts are also beating like a drum, but they do what they know needs to be done until the task is completed. The key is to take that first step forward no matter what you are faced with. Then take a second, third and forth step as well. You will soon gather a rhythm of your own while you write that first page of your book or put down that paint on your masterpiece’s canvas. Yes my friend feel the fear and then do what needs to be done anyway.
Spend some time today pushing back the resistance that have been blocking you for far too long now. Make a list of stuff that you have been sidestepping for a while now. Take number one on the list and do what needs to be done until you can put a tick (task completed) next to it on your list. Now do the same with number two etc. You will soon be flooded with powerful surges of energy and courage. I will continue this series tomorrow.
Use the following method and power words when you are searching for new ideas or fresh perspectives. They say that the difference between a rut and the grave is about six feet. Many of us slip into a groove and continue to play out our lives until change is forced on us. Nothing new can be created until you work up enough desire and courage to change something. Everything will stay the same until you change the current recipe.
Creativity comes to those that are not afraid of the unknown. Inventors and innovators dare to go where nobody went before. They think of ways to achieve a specific objective or solve a problem that later seem so logical, but that have been ignored because it challenged the current rules. No progress is possible while you sustain methods and systems that might be outdated and defective.
The golden rule is to remain vigilant for fresh ideas all the time. Most of the biggest inventions came about when someone identified a problem and allowed his mind to come up with a solution. Many of us become passive or panic we are faced with a potential problem. The innovators love problems and do not view them as barriers. They see them, as wonderful opportunities to improve or create something brand new that will make certain problems go away.
The innovators are responsible for everything that you see when you look out of the window. They saw solutions while the rest of the people remained focused on the problems. Your mind is a powerful computer that is connected to the universal mind. There is an unlimited resource of data stored in the universal mind’s archives. Creative people tap these archives and often come up with amazing inventions. Individuals that are not even connected to a specific industry come up with ideas that stun those that have been working there for years.
Use the following method and power word the next time that you are faced with a problem or barrier. Focus on the situation, problem or obstacle and repeat the power word “create”. This power word will activate a creative process in your mind.
You will soon discover that your mind will begin to search for solutions where it possibly in the past could only dig up hundreds of reasons why something just cannot be done. You will soon find that several options will come to mind when you trigger your inventive power by using the word “create”.
You are a creator in your own right. You have been creating for many years. Look around you and become aware of the many things you created to date. You created your own world and circumstances. Your historical mindset directed what you created in all areas of your life. The choices that you made historically formed the base of what you have today.
You can spend your time creating wonderful innovations or you can waste it creating excuses why certain things cannot be done. Repeat the word “create” the next time that you need a solution to a problem. You will soon discover that you will have several options or combinations of ideas that could assist you to overcome what you are faced with.
The key is to focus on the outcome you desire. The power word “create” will cause creative chemicals to be released by your brain. You will suddenly think solutions and not problems like you have possibly done in the past.
I suggest that you make notes of all ideas that surface after you used the power word “create”. Do not judge what come to mind. You will be able to later use one or a combination of the ideas that surfaced to “create” a solution to the problem. Remember you can use this system to innovate and “create” even when you have no immediate problems that need your urgent attention.
Repeat this power word when you are faced with a problem or challenge that you would like to overcome. Create. Create. Create.
Possible other power words you can use: Solution. Solution. Explore. Explore. Innovate. Innovate.
Rene
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To accomplish (1) great things we must not only act (2), but also dream (3), not only plan (4), but also believe (5).
Anatole France
The word accomplish is not always fully understood by people. The word (1) accomplish signifies to finish, complete or bring something to an end. You cannot claim that you accomplished your goal or objective if you do not bring something to a successful conclusion. Most people are excellent at starting things, but the real winners in life understand that without completion there is no reason to celebrate.
You might plant your seeds in the garden of life, but if you fail to follow through you will not reap the fruit of your labour. Everything that is worthwhile accomplishing starts with a dream (3). Most of the wonderful inventions you see around you today started with an idea in the head of someone. When the idea is transformed into a dream it is given the opportunity to materialize. Most people allow their ideas and dreams to die unceremoniously in their heads.
Most of the most brilliant inventions never got past the dream stage because their owners never acted (2) on their inspirations. The best books were never written because the potential authors could not summon up enough courage to write the first page. If you want to make your dreams a reality you need to think up a plan (4) to take it past the dream stage.
Only a few people get past their own negative self-talk. Most people do not have the courage and fortitude to take something through to a successful conclusion. Friends and family are excellent flaw finders, but usually do not have any plans of their own. Most of them resigned themselves to what they call their “fate” in life and know that they will remain just a face in the crowd of faceless mediocre people.
When you listen to the fainthearted you will become one of their clan. You will see danger and failure in every shadow. It takes courage and lots of faith in your ideas, dreams and plans if you want to take them through to a successful conclusion. You must believe (5) if you want to achieve. You must not allow negative thinkers to shoot down your plans and goals.
They say faith can move mountains. When you really believe in your mission you will overcome all obstacles that attempt to prevent you from achieving your objectives.
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I WILL ACCOMPLISH ANY TASK THAT I FOCUS ON BECAUSE I AM DETERMINED AND MOTIVATED. I WILL PERSIST UNTIL MY DREAM BECOMES A REALITY!
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You are the creator of your own successes and failures. The choices that you make will lead you toward or away from your goals and dreams. The cowards are afraid to act because they fear failure. The winners accept that failure is not a destination, but simply a part of the process. Nothing worthwhile was ever achieved without serious effort and painful failures. All that failure indicates to you is that you still need to make a few modifications to your plan. Failures expect their plans to work without a hitch and fall apart if the don’t. Winners expect setbacks and do not allow them to deflate their initial passion and commitment. Winners do not allow the negative comments of friends and enemies to dismantle their dreams and plans.
If you have been walking around for years with a good idea in your head, now may be a good time to activate some serious action to make it a reality. I do not claim that it will be easy or that all your dreams will become a reality, but why not give some of them your best shot? How would you feel if you read in a magazine or newspaper, that someone else made millions with a similar idea than the one you have allowed to hibernate in your mind?
Stop blaming everybody for your failures. You are ultimately in control of your own destiny. There is a fallacy that it is a disgrace to fail. Failure is not the end of the road, but simply an indicator that you still have certain lessons to learn. Failure is your built in alarm system that detects when you need to put in some additional work in a specific area. It is not the kiss of death to your hopes and dreams.
Stop calling it bad luck or some kind of conspiracy when you are actually the one that gave up on your dreams. Dreams without a constructive plan action are a total waste of time. Dreams can be compared to a seed. Only when this seed is watered (action) and nurtured (work) will it turn into a mature plant that can feed your family.
Stop focusing on your own needs for a while if you want to expand your influence at a rapid and spectacular pace. Only when you sincerely become interested in people will you see, feel, and hear who they really are. Our minds are so flooded with prejudice and preconceived perceptions that our mental growth is put on hold at a very young age. We lost our ability to listen a long time ago and only give attention to what others say when we feel that there might be something for us in the deal.
Stop taking people, your goals and projects so seriously. I found that a focused approach and a “no fear of loss” attitude take you a long way towards a successful and happy life. How can you enjoy your successes if you never knew failure? Give things your best shot and go for gold every time. You will win some and lose some, but you will feel alive and part of the game of life. Learn to say, “so what” when things fail to work out as expected. Learn to see the humour in your failures. Remember when you cry, you cry alone.
Stop waiting for others to earn your approval and love. Go out and show your love for others unconditionally. It is your fear that is holding you back. Take off your protective gear and show your feelings my friend or you will never experience real happiness and true love. It takes courage to expose yourself to potential rejection and failure, but champions do not succumb to their fear!
Stop wasting your time trying to understand why people act the way they do. They are inhabitants of the outer world. You have ownership and control of your own world, but not of the outer world. You will tire and deplete yourself in the process and set yourself up for failure if you attempt to control or adjust the outer world. Accept that no permanent control is possible in the outer world. The governments, police and the armies of all the nations on the planet cannot fully control this world’s inhabitants. What makes you think that you can?
To accomplish (1) great things we must not only act (2), but also dream (3), not only plan (4), but also believe (5).
Anatole France
The word accomplish is not always fully understood by people. The word (1) accomplish signifies to finish, complete or bring something to an end. You cannot claim that you accomplished your goal or objective if you do not bring something to a successful conclusion. Most people are excellent at starting things, but the real winners in life understand that without completion there is no reason to celebrate.
You might plant your seeds in the garden of life, but if you fail to follow through you will not reap the fruit of your labour. Everything that is worthwhile accomplishing starts with a dream (3). Most of the wonderful inventions you see around you today started with an idea in the head of someone. When the idea is transformed into a dream it is given the opportunity to materialize. Most people allow their ideas and dreams to die unceremoniously in their heads.
Most of the most brilliant inventions never got past the dream stage because their owners never acted (2) on their inspirations. The best books were never written because the potential authors could not summon up enough courage to write the first page. If you want to make your dreams a reality you need to think up a plan (4) to take it past the dream stage.
Only a few people get past their own negative self-talk. Most people do not have the courage and fortitude to take something through to a successful conclusion. Friends and family are excellent flaw finders, but usually do not have any plans of their own. Most of them resigned themselves to what they call their “fate” in life and know that they will remain just a face in the crowd of faceless mediocre people.
When you listen to the fainthearted you will become one of their clan. You will see danger and failure in every shadow. It takes courage and lots of faith in your ideas, dreams and plans if you want to take them through to a successful conclusion. You must believe (5) if you want to achieve. You must not allow negative thinkers to shoot down your plans and goals.
They say faith can move mountains. When you really believe in your mission you will overcome all obstacles that attempt to prevent you from achieving your objectives.
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I WILL ACCOMPLISH ANY TASK THAT I FOCUS ON BECAUSE I AM DETERMINED AND MOTIVATED. I WILL PERSIST UNTIL MY DREAM BECOMES A REALITY!
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You are the creator of your own successes and failures. The choices that you make will lead you toward or away from your goals and dreams. The cowards are afraid to act because they fear failure. The winners accept that failure is not a destination, but simply a part of the process. Nothing worthwhile was ever achieved without serious effort and painful failures. All that failure indicates to you is that you still need to make a few modifications to your plan. Failures expect their plans to work without a hitch and fall apart if the don’t. Winners expect setbacks and do not allow them to deflate their initial passion and commitment. Winners do not allow the negative comments of friends and enemies to dismantle their dreams and plans.
If you have been walking around for years with a good idea in your head, now may be a good time to activate some serious action to make it a reality. I do not claim that it will be easy or that all your dreams will become a reality, but why not give some of them your best shot? How would you feel if you read in a magazine or newspaper, that someone else made millions with a similar idea than the one you have allowed to hibernate in your mind?
There is a misconception that courageous people fight lions or crocodiles with their bare hands, jump out of planes or over cliffs or play with snakes that could kill them in seconds. It often takes more courage to say something that need to be said than any of the above. A person that lacks courage feel that he/she is up against a solid brick wall when important things need to be expressed that could impact on their relationship.
What such individuals fail to understand is that their lack of courage is creating a void between them and their man/woman. The lack of courage create separation that could in time topple their relationship. The frustration and anger often experienced in relationships can be traced back to a lack of courage. Things become extremely complicated when one of the partners suffer with a lack of courage, but things get worse when both parties lack courage expect their partner to do mind reading.
Direct and fearless communication bring people together and remove the stuff that partners often just speculate about. It is healthy to express negative and positive emotions. There is nothing wrong when you express your anger or frustration as long as it is done in a mature manner. Your partner then get the opportunity to see what is really bothering you and can attempt to rectify possible misunderstandings.
The courage to say how you feel about your partner when it comes to love is vital. It is silly to expect your partner to guess or decode that you love him/her if they carefully study your actions. Be brave and tell it like it is. When you love stop hinting and stop leaving it to your partner to solve the puzzle. You might think that you are mystical when you do this, but I can tell you that it is a dangerous game that you are playing. Your man/woman might run into someone that don’t lack courage that can express him/herself in a clear and precise manner when it comes to love. To summarize we need to remember that communication reduce distance while the lack of courage in turn create massive voids. Why spend so many hours bridge building when you can bridge the gap in moments when you tell it like it is?
Everyday you make a thousand choices. You choose what to wear, where to go, who to meet, what to eat and what to do. MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL, YOU decide WHAT TO THINK. One thing is sure and that is that your day will not be better than your thoughts. ...................
Just close your eyes for a moment and see if you can visualise this open toolbox and if you can see the hundreds of tools that are neatly placed in this toolbox. Now look if you can see the maker’s name on these tools. The creator of these tools (thoughts and perceptions) is you. You created thousands of thoughts and perceptions (tools) about everything since your childhood. ..................
When confronted with any situation or problem you reach into this toolbox and take out what you think the most appropriate tool would be and then attempt to fix the problem. It is estimated that your mind thinks at least 2,500 thoughts an hour. Every thought that you think is a tool (perception) that you have that you imagine would work best under specific circumstances. This thought process continues day and night and will do so for the rest of your life. .....................................
I am convinced that we think ourselves to a standstill. We never stop playing with these tools in our toolbox and can hardly ever really relax for a while. If we are not faced with a problem or task that needs completion we still continue to take out these tools and mentally rehears and contemplate how we will use them should something that we fear become a reality. ............................
We are forever thinking and scheming and never become still and tranquil inside. Our bodies might seem relaxed, but deep inside our heads this thought process continues churning around. What I am most worried about is that most of the tools that you have in your toolbox are very old and outdated. .......................
Many of the opportunities, problems and obstructions that you face daily cannot be repaired while you are using old and outdated tools. If you take a modern mechanic’s toolbox and you place the toolbox of a mechanic of fifty years ago next to it you will find that there are major discrepancies. When you are confronted with something that needs repair and you do not have the right tool for the task at hand it can be very frustrating. We usually improvise and try using some other tools and hope that it will also get the job done. ........................
When you are faced with a problem you need to select the right tool for the task at hand. If you do not have the tool in your toolbox it can complicate your life. What most people seem to ignore is that it is sometimes better not to reach for your toolbox when faced with a problem. Sometimes you need time to pass or need to leave the problem with its rightful owner. How well you use your tools is usually reflected in the world you see around you. What would you do if you were faced with any or all of the following? .........................
You get a flat tire on your way to an important customer or meeting. You can fall apart, develop a migraine and think that life is against you or you can take out the right tools (patience and reality) and take care of the problem in a relaxed manner. ........................
You have been working on the computer for hours and suddenly lose all your work. You can drop dead with a heart attack; think that God hates you or you can take out the right tool (sanity and reality) and begin over and this time remember to make a backup of your work. ....................
A lover or wife possibly cheated on you. You can go crazy and get an assassin to take out the potential threat to your relationship, think that you are a failure or you can take out the right tool (no fear of loss) and get on with your life. .......................
When you have the right tools in your toolbox it makes life a lot easier. The choices we make are vital in our lives. The more quality choices we make during any given day the higher the probability of success and peace of mind. ................
I suggest that you equip your toolbox with the best tools you can lay your hands on. It is important to upgrade if you discover that one of your tools are outdated or that a more modern version is available. How would you react if your TV packed up and a technician that obviously knows very little about electronics arrived at your house with only a sledgehammer and a few other primitive tools in his toolbox? I am sure that you will send him away and find someone better qualified and equipped for the task. .....................
You might sometimes be like this incompetent and poorly equipped technician indicated above if you do not often update your tools (thoughts) in your toolbox. You can also have all the right tools in your toolbox and never use them because you are afraid that you might make a mistake. ..................
You must remember that happiness and success is always just one thought (tool) away. You should remember when you find it difficult to cope with something that one new tool (thought) could change your life. One fresh thought and one new idea can change your life from pain and suffering to success and peace of mind. ........................
You are today what you were programmed with yesterday. The choices that you make on a moment-to-moment basis decide your fate and future. You can never feel or perform better than the ongoing thoughts and feelings that you allow to occupy your mind! .......................
The mistake we make is that most of us live our lives on a reactive basis. We start and complete our day in a reactive state of being. Something comes to our attention via our five senses or via a thought in our mind. We automatically slip into the “role” that we created for ourselves many moons ago. We act, react and experience the same feelings and emotions that we embedded with our scrip at its inception. We do exactly the same when new stimuli push the previous “drama” off the stage in our minds. We sustain this reactive mode of thinking until we finally go to bed at night. Most of our days are made up of a tapestry of “roles” that we played in our own colorful way. It is important to understand that nothing is going to change until we do something different. We cannot repeat the same old recipes and expect a different outcome. ....................
You can use the “Portable Life Skills Wisdom” book to develop a range of appropriate scripts that you can use when you are faced with a problem or project that need your attention. You will if you apply the scripts in this book find that you no longer run your life on a reactive basis. The new scripts will help you to live your life in the moment. You will become more realistic. You will treat each event on its own merit. How do you do this? ......................
The Process ....................
Read the first message in your book. Write it down if at all possible. It will assist you to absorb the data provided. Now sit back and close your eyes and visualize how you will apply the specific message in the various areas of your life. See yourself on the screen of your mind using the message in all your day-to-day activities. It is important to attempt to feel and experience the benefits that this new mode of thinking will bring into your life. Do this for ten minutes. Then open your eyes and begin to apply the wisdom on all occasions where appropriate in your activities on that given day. ...........................
Proceed to do the same with second message etc. in your book tomorrow. You will upload almost a thousand powerful recipes if you sustain the process indicated above. You can in less than three years upload a powerful “tool” system that will serve you for the rest of your life. This can be a life changing experience if you apply it daily. You will discover that the ten minutes you invest daily will upload countless new strategies into your subconscious computer. Build a successful and happy life. The key however is action. You can have the best tools available to man and still fail if you don’t use them daily. Wishing you the very best with this endeavor. .............................
Daily Support System (This Blog) ................
You not only have the massive key ideas in the book that you can use when appropriate you also receive daily posts on a wide range of subjects that will expand this system to a level never offered before. Visit this blog daily for fresh new ideas with a sprinkle of historical wisdom that stood the test of time. ..........................
Rene
PORTABLE LIFE SKILLS DAILY WISDOM GUIDE 
