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Remember, you don’t want your kids learning about sex from someone else.

 

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Here are a few tips about discussing sexuality with your kids, and a few things you should know:

 

  1. When is the right time to discuss sex with your kids? Truth is, it’s never too soon. Body parts and all. If a child learns to be ashamed of their body, this can lead to body image issues later in life. Or even shame around sexuality.

  2. Be positive about all bodily functions. Meaning, when you’re changing a diaper, don’t say “OMG, that stinks!” There’s nothing to be ashamed of about something that’s just a part of every day life. It sends a bad signal

  3. If you catch your kid in what a professional would call, “self-stimulation,” DO NOT push their hand away or punish them for their exploration. I actually caught my boy exploring once, and my comment to him was, “That’s normal behavior, but it’s private behavior, so if you want to continue, you’ll have to go into your room for that, buddy.” You know what he did? He got up, walked out, went into his room, and slammed the door! Not a word of a lie! That’s my boy! He was 3. But seriously, don’t make your child feel this is shameful behavior.

  4. How does a baby get in your tummy? A good answer would be to explain that when a man and woman love each other, and get married (yes you may say that or not), the man puts his penis in a woman’s vagina, and his sperm fertilizes her egg, and a baby then grows. WWWWWHHHOOOOOO!!! Screeching breaks!!! But really, you could absolutely say this. However, a suggested age is not before grade 2-4. So, I say, use your judgement and go accordingly. That may be over-share for some. But if they ask you to confirm it as truth, then you have the right to confirm that.

  5. And finally, be open and available. Let them know that whatever questions they have, no matter how private, or how silly it may seem, you are ALWAYS there to listen. Remember, you don’t want your kids learning about sex from someone else. Let it come from you. Shake off the worries, and get talking. And please, MONITOR THEIR WEB SURFING BEHAVIOR. This is a biggie.

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http://womenonthefence.com/2010/04/30/lets-talk-about-sex-baby/

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SOME READERS CAN NO LONGER REMEMBER WHY MEN/WOMEN HAVE SEX – LINK BELOW 

Reasons Why Men & Women Have Sex

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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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There is a time to fight and a time to just bide your time.

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You Are Only One Thought Away From Inner Peace

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We sometimes feel like a swimmer in trouble a long way
from the safety of the beach. We have no idea where the
currents are taking us. We feel dwarfed by the immense ocean
that seems to go on forever. We see water wherever we look.
We feel the powerful churn of the awesome power under us.
We panic and try to make our way back to the beach, but soon
realise that we are not really making any progress. We start
panicking and try even harder, but to no avail. It suddenly
dawns on us that we will surly die if we continue to fight the
ocean.


The ocean will allow us to disperse all our energy. It will then
swallow us and later spit us out on some lonely beach a long
way down the coast. The only way we can buy time when in a
situation like this is to relax and to go with the flow. There is
absolutely no benefit in fighting a problem that is currently
out of control or too daunting to handle. There is a time to
fight and a time to just bide your time. It will make sense if
you swim to the best of your ability to reach the beach if you
are strong or fit enough, but it will be foolish to try and fight
the waves if you have absolutely no chance of winning.
Most of our problems, yes even the ones that seem extremely
daunting have a way of working itself out in the end. Most of
us have been faced with a wide range of problems, some of
them quite serious that today are nothing more than faded
memories. The biggest mistake we make when faced with a
problem is to immediately jump in and try to make it go away.
We say or do the first thing that comes to mind. We must not
fight problems. The best way to cope with problems is to
gather as much information as we can before we take action.
We are only escalating a problem to crisis proportions when
we panic and attempt to fight our way out of a trouble zone.

Relax, gather information and then do what you can, one
moment at a time. It is sometimes better to do nothing until
you have the strength, resources or finances to cope with
what you are faced with. Panic feed a problem while relaxed
action in turn become like the steering mechanism of a boat.
You can steer your way out of virtually any trouble during the
stormy period on the sea of life if you remain composed and
continue to think things through before you take action.
We are under the impression that specific things or people
can and should contribute to our needs and preferences. We
become depressed and unhappy if any of the things or people
that we deem attached to us let us down or fail to meet our
expectations. We only discover the intricate and inclusive
web we weaved since early childhood when we notice how
invisible and subliminal cables bind us to thousands of
objects and preferences. We in a way think we own these
objects and suffer separation anxiety when even a single item
is disconnected from us. Most of us suffer with fear of loss
and rejection. We absorb serious abused from those that we
think we are attached to. We tolerate the pain they inflict
because we are afraid that they might let go of us if we show
our disdain with their actions. A partner, child or lover can
cause us unwanted discomfort if they threaten to let go of us
or indicate that they want to be released from our comfort
zone. It is our attachment that makes us extremely vulnerable.
We do not only develop this invisible bond with people. We
allow furniture, books, a house or even an old coat to own us.
Attachment seems to indicate ownership to most of us. We
thus allow a wide range of people and things to own us and to
decide our moods and perceived security. Buddha taught his
students the powerful law of detachment. He indicated that we
can never achieve spiritual freedom while we allow anything
or anyone to own us. His advice is to let go of the false notion
that our lives will grind to a halt if we let go of the false
perception that it is what we own that sustain who we are. We
are not what we own, the car we drive or the house we live in.
We are not our money or titles. All these labels sustain our
egos and have nothing to do with the perfect self at our core.
God needs nothing from nobody. The same holds true with
our perfect selves. We are an extension of God and not our
physical bodies and the things that we accumulate around us
during visits to this dimension. Learn to detach and you will
change your life overnight. Let go of your anger, fear of loss
or desire to be respected and loved. These desires are snacks
for your ego and have absolutely nothing to do with the
reason for your current or future visits to this plane. Become
still and mentally see how you cut the endless number of
cords that currently bind you to things and people in the
matrix. You will discover real freedom when you are no longer
influenced and manipulated by the false perception of
ownership. It is our clinging to people and stuff that give them
power over us. Detach from what people say or do, detach
from the negative messages in the newspapers and media.
You can never fly with the eagles while you strut around like a
chicken in a pen with your head in the sand.


We spend years trying to work out the mysteries of life. We
want to know who we are, where we come from and what we
are doing in this dimension. We want to know why people do
certain things or why they failed to do as we expect they
would. We want to know what tomorrow, next week or next
year will confront us with. We want to know all there is to
know about God, his plans for us or what will happen to us
when we die. We want to understand why we get tired or feel
ill. Most of us have been asking “why” questions from early
childhood. We read thousands of books in an attempt to
understand what life is all about. The more we read the deeper
we need to delve into the subject matter. There is no book
that can provide all the answers. The problem with books or
lectures is that they leave us with more questions than
answers.


We begin to feel like a person that is trying to dig a hole in the
sand. Every bucket of sand that he takes out results in two
buckets that slide back into the hole. Those that developed
the historical God concepts pulled a serious stunt on us. They
created so many laws, rules, expectations and regulations
that they claim God expect of us that they left us in a no win
situation. Nobody could since the first man appeared on this
plane sustain God’s requirements that he apparently
personally dictated to the early so-called inspired authors. It
was our inability to meet the expectations of these man made
Gods that forced mankind to cling to religion and those that
claimed that they have direct access to God. We became
these mediators’ slaves and financiers. We ate out of their
hands and jump to their commands. It is impossible to get
closure on our endless range of “why” questions.


Each question answered will just dig up new ones that need
to be answered. It becomes a vicious never ending cycle. We
spend the best part of our life in a state of ignorance. We will
never know why people that we love and trust let us down or
stick a knife in our backs. We will never know why individuals
act and react the way they do. We will live longer and become
much happier if we stop trying to dig up answers to the many
mysteries of life and why people say or do certain things.
This is why I recommend that you live your life one moment at
a time and give each moment your best shot. Live as if there
is no tomorrow, as if this will be your last day. Be bold and
know that you can cope with anything that life can throw at
you tomorrow, next week and five years from now. Stop
asking “why” questions. Learn to mentally dump your “why”
question in a mental bin if you do not have a satisfactory
answer in sixty seconds. We are like a dog that tries to catch
a bus with “why” painted in big bold letters on its side. Our
problem is that even if we are fortunate enough to catch this
bus now and then we have no idea what to do with it once we
caught it. Your perfect self know all the answers. It is your
ego or false self that becomes frantic and petrified about the
unknown.


We have ongoing input from our five senses. We are exposed
to millions of stimuli every hour. We have a reticular
activation system in our brains that are programmed to
immediately bring any input to our attention if it might pose a
threat to us at any time. Anything that we see, hear, taste, or
smell that might have caused us discomfort, loss or pain in
the past or that could cause us loss, pain or discomfort in the
future is immediately brought to our attention. This is a good
system because it warns us of pending danger.
Our problem is that something went wrong with our system
that validates incoming data. The holes in the filter became so
clogged up that it hardly let anything through. Many of us can
see danger or possible disaster in virtually anything.


Thoughts that pose no problem simply flow through our filter
system and have little or no impact on us. It is the thoughts
that are captured in our potential threat filter system that we
feel compelled to deal with. The mistake that we then make is
that we begin to construct mental movies about the perceived
threat in our heads. We mentally see, feel, smell, hear and
taste the negative outcomes that we write into these scripts.
We are not satisfied with one show in the theatre of our
minds. We replay these movies many times and experience
the possible painful negative outcomes a million times. We
wear ourselves out while we work through these illusions in
our heads. We find it difficult to sleep, eat or do our work
because of these horror movies. We end up with health
problems and in the process destroy our relationships as
well. We take the residue that got trapped in our mental filter
system and make it into a monster that haunts us day and
night. We will be safer and saner if we remove the filters in
our heads. The original purpose of these filters was to protect
us against physical threats. We knew that if our filter detected
a hungry dinosaur that it will be a smart idea to put as much
distance as possible between him and us in the shortest
period of time.


We must however now begin to understand that we live in a
different time under different circumstances. I promise you
that you can allow most of the stuff that are today trapped in
your filter system through. It will not harm you and become a
faded memory in an hour or two. We must allow the endless
stream of thoughts to simply flow through our reticular
activation system. Do not block them. Let them slide through
and join the billions that came before them on the garbage
heap in your past. Keep this in mind the next time you feel
sad, overloaded, trapped, anxious, worried, let down, defeated
or angry. Let these thoughts slide by. Do not energise them.
They have no power until you plug in the power with your
thinking. Your perfect self can and will assist you when you
are faced with a real threat. Do not allow your ego to take up
so much of your time. Your ego needs answers and
protection because it is a coward. Your ego want answers to
his “why” questions. Your perfect self is positive and know
that it can handle anything that anybody or life can throw at
you.

Rene

 

From my book – The Hidden Treasure Within

 
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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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“No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.”

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Far too often people let their emotional well-being be dictated by the words and actions of others. It’s time for everyone to follow their own true path and stop chasing after the compliments and expectations of others.

 

Taking other people’s judgments personally undermines your self-worth.

 

In Don Miguel Ruiz’s inspirational book, The Four Agreements, he discusses this human flaw of taking things personally. According to Ruiz, nothing other people say or do is because of you. Rather, it has everything to do with their own reality. It says much more about them than about you.

 

Let’s say you have a co-worker who constantly puts you down. Maybe he or she does it subtly, but they nonetheless seek out ways to undermine your confidence. They roll their eyes when you speak up in a meeting. They make fun of what you’re wearing. And if you confront them about their behavior, they chastise you for not being able to take a ‘joke’. Hopefully, this isn’t your experience, but I think you know what I’m talking about.

 

You need to take a step back and think about why this person is acting this way. As a general rule happy, confident individuals don’t behave like this. Not at all. People who exhibit this type of predatory, cruel behavior are actually miserable, lack confidence and essentially project their negativity onto others.

 

Chances are you’re the target because this person knows that their continuous little digs get to you. It gives them power and makes them feel better (temporarily). As soon as their comments and actions have absolutely no impact on you, they’ll stop. Guaranteed.

 

In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt: “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.”

Don Miguel Ruiz also describes taking things personally as the “ultimate act of selfishness.” Huh? Well, when you take things personally, you assume everything is about YOU. It’s not. Again, what people say has so much more to do with them than it does about you.

 

Dr. Wayne Dyer also weighs in on the idea of taking things personally in his book The Power of IntentionDyer says that when you allow the opinions of others to be more important than your opinions of yourself, you lose self-respect. Why would you put your opinions of yourself below those of another person? Rather, you deserve to believe you’re valuable and worthy.

 

A few more kernels of knowledge on the subject:

 

1. Compliments are just gravy

Compliments are lovely aren’t they? But here’s the thing: If you’re hooked by the compliments, you’re hooked by the criticism. You need to get to a place where both credit and criticism can’t touch you. Compliments can’t be the source of your strength, because what if they dry up, what then? They’re just gravy – extra dressing, but no real substance.

 

2. Stop colluding

Let’s say you perceive a situation as negative. For example, a friend chose to spend the evening with someone else instead of you or you received a curt e-mail from your boss. You’re hurt. What do you do? One reaction that is temporarily soothing is to call someone, unload your hurt and anger, and get them hooked into your story. This is a big energy investment and utterly not worth it. Inviting others to collude in your story only perpetuates the pattern of taking things much too personally. Collusion is rounding up individuals who believe your ownillusion. Not good!

 

3. Always keep the larger goal in mind

Who you become on your life journey is far more meaningful than what happens to you. When you learn how to get beyond taking things personally by observing and then choosing an alternate response, you will eventually become unshakable. You can lose your job; you can be broke; you can be forced to leave your home. But no one can take away who you are – your essence. As you become a person who is clear and centered, you will have the tools to succeed in life no matter what happens in the external world.

 

Exercises

 

These exercises are designed to help you move past taking things personally. To get the most out of these exercises you must put all your energy into them. Go beyond understanding them on an intellectual level, really feel the intention behind them.

 

To do these exercises, find a friend or a partner to help you out. In the first exercise you’re going to insert the name of someone who has hurt you in the past. Now say the phrase out loud and do it with as much intention as possible. Repeat it as many times as is needed until you feel the hurt dissipating.

 

For the second exercise, you’re going to insert your own name. Say this phrase over and over with positive intensity (not anger) to the person who is helping you with this exercise. Look them right in the eye and say it. If you’re not comfortable using the word ‘f*#k’, insert a word that has a lot of energy for you. (Harv was big on having us use this word because it can be rather liberating.) Also make sure you use the word ‘and’ (don’t use ‘but’), because you both love them and you don’t care what they think about you. Keep repeating this phrase until you feel a surge of personal power.

 

Exercise 1

__________, I now understand that what you did and said had nothing to do with me and everything to do with you. You were projecting your own mental baggage and bad programming onto me. I unknowingly let in your poison. I now choose to let that poison go and fully release myself from this hurt.

 

Exercise 2

Hi, my name is __________. I love and respect you, and I don’t give a f*@k about what you think about me. Have a nice day!

 

How did you feel after doing these exercises?

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SEND THIS ARTICLE TO A FRIEND THAT MIGHT ENJOY IT!

 by Michelle Rogers

 
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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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LOOK AT LIFE FROM MANY DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES.

 

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BE BOLD AND STRETCH YOUR COMFORT ZONE DAILY – NO GROWTH IS POSSIBLE WHILE YOU ENDLESSLY REPEAT THE SAME OLD STUFF – IT IS OK TO BE SCEPTICAL, BUT OPEN YOUR MIND AND BEGIN TO LOOK AT LIFE FROM MANY DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES. YOU WILL BE CHALLENGED WHEN YOU VISIT THE READING ROOM – VISIT DAILY AND DISCOVER HOW POWERFUL YOU ARE!

RENE

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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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Can you think how much better the world would have been if we were taught by parents/society to live ONE MOMENT at a time in the NOW?

 

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I am often asked the question, “Why am I making such poor choices and cause myself so many problems notwithstanding all my good intentions?” “I might decide to lose weight, stop procrastinating, manage my anger or be more patient with my children, but slip back into my historical negative and destructive mode of thinking and doing time and again. There are not many that understand who is actually running the show in their lives. You have a conscious and a subconscious mind.

The conscious mind is the mind that you use on a moment to moment basis. It is the mind that we engage when we work in a productive and controlled manner. We usually remain objective and do what needs to be done when confronted with challenges, projects or problems. The conscious mind can be viewed as the operating system in a computer. I am for example using a word processing system to compile this document. Everything I type appear or the screen of the computer. I can contemplate every word and sentence and modify or change my work until I am satisfied with the outcome. To summarize then. I remain focused in the moment and sustain my action until I achieve the outcome that I desire.

The sub-conscious mind is the software data bank where stuff are stored for immediate recall. It contains everything that I learned or experienced since early childhood. Most of us fail to understand that it is actually their sub-conscious minds that are running the show in their lives. We do have short periods of conscious control over what we say, do or how we address certain issues, but fail to grasp that the moment we stop our conscious thinking the sub-conscious mind click into motion. The biggest part of any given day is run by the sub-conscious mind. The weird thing about the subconscious mind is that it has no reasoning power. It can only act according to the historical data stored on any given matter. I want to repeat that the sub-conscious mind do not have the ability to reason about subject matter at hand. It will prompt you to act or react according to the data or belief systems embedded historically. This is the main reason why we repeat the same mistakes and habits daily. We live a “copy” of our previous day or all the days before. Example: You get into your vehicle and “automatically” drive to your destination without consciously thinking about every action needed to navigate your vehicle. The program in your sub-conscious mind kick in and usually get you to your destination without too many hassles. This is an example where your sub-conscious mind work to your advantage, but there are many instances where defective and outdated programs cause you to make the same mistakes. We thus consciously address our lives to the best of our abilities in the moment until we relax or react and let our sub-conscious mind take over.

We would live perfectly happy and productive lives if our sub-conscious programs were of a high standard. We are however aware of the fact that not all our programs are based on quality and updated information. Some of the data that we currently use is totally outdated or might have been flawed from the start. We might have all the good intentions in the world and attempt to override a defective program, but usually find that it is not easy to modify the ingrained habitual reaction patterns. The reason for this is because the old data and reaction patterns have been “hard wired” into our sub-conscious computer. Your brain automatically send out chemical and electrical signals to all the cells of your body according to the historical software that govern a given situation. I hope you can see why it is so difficult for your conscious mind with all its good intentions to modify your habitual reaction patterns. You might be a person with strong willpower, but will find that the moment you lose your conscious focus you also lose your ability to arrest the old programs from taking over.

Can you think how much better the world would have been if we were taught and conditioned by parents and a society to live ONE MOMENT at a time in the NOW? Most of us would have spent much more time coping with life in an objective and realistic manner. There would have been virtually no need to fight our sub-conscious minds with our willpower and determination. The quality of our lives would have been much better, productive and real. Our relationships would have been less contaminated by old toxic programs uploaded by individuals that dumped their fears and anxieties into our operating systems.

Rene

 
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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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School Buses in India

 

At first sight these buses may look horrifying, like miniature cattle wagons full of children. But they are a feature of a type of culture that is different from America where yellow school buses shuttle children often over large distances. This culture, common throughout the world is one that has grown organically, where distances are short enough to be cycled and where home brew transportation is common.

 

art,image,tattoo,wallpaper

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art,image,tattoo,wallpaper

art,image,tattoo,wallpaper

MORE PICTURES

 

http://golden-celebrity-gucci.blogspot.com/2010/01/school-buses-in-india.html

 
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Posted by on July 25, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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It is our desire to maintain the known that prevent us from finding creative solutions when challenged.

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There are some families that could do well if they could get one of the TV networks to do a reality show on all their day-to-day activities. These families have an endless stream of dramas that erupt spontaneously as if scripted. The parents watch each other like hawks. They became experts over the years putting each other down or pointing out each other’s flaws and mistakes. Their children faithfully copy the example set by the parents. They, from the youngest up sustain an ongoing intolerance with each other. Verbal and even physical battles start soon after sunrise and continue unabated until they finally get to bed at night. Individuals and families that operate from the RESISTANCE zone are well versed in the endless range of distractions displayed by those that live together under the influence of the force of RESISTANCE. A minor problem or obstacle is often amplified and blown out of proportion. A leaking tap for example can be turned into a fully blow drama by those that RESIST venturing outside the collective family comfort zone. A small mistake made by any of the family members can easily spin out of control. Family members take sides while blame and abuse fly around like missiles in a war zone. Closer inspection of a family with this frame of mind always reveal that each family member is so committed to his or her bubble of RESISTANCE that little or no compassion can be traced. An amazing thing happen when one of the family members is threatened by an outside source. The whole family then unite to fend off the perceive threat. You should keep in mind that notwithstanding the fact that each family member has his or her own unique RESISTANCE field, the family still operate under a collective field of RESISTANCE. It is this collective field that briefly unite the family during periods of crisis. The unification does not last long in families that tend to dramatise everything. The collective RESISTANCE bubble rapidly deflate and each family member rush back to his or her previous mode of operation. It is our resistance to change and our resistance to venture outside our perception base that stifles our progress. It is our desire to maintain the known that prevent us from finding creative solutions when challenged. The same collective mode of operation is rife in groups, clubs, religions and political parties. It is our RESISTANCE to new ideas and alternative solutions that put a ceiling on our ability to grow and evolve. Do you notice how claustrophobic the zone of RESISTANCE can become for a person or group that allow their fear to control their entrepreneurial spirit?

 

Spend some time today to see if you can identify groups that operate from the zone of RESISTANCE. Make notes how such groups allow dramas, restrictions and infighting limit their ability to solve problems or achieve goals that could benefit the entire group. I will continue this series tomorrow.

 

Rene

 
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Posted by on July 25, 2014 in WISDOM

 

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